They say once you go Grinch you'll never go back.
LovableSidekick
One time my roommate gave me a welding starter set cuz he wanted to learn how to weld LOL.
The American Dream - a tax-optimized portfolio of high-yield stocks, bonds and mutual funds.
Florida: Okay fuck it we're seceding, who's with me?
Texas: Yo!
Another solution is to cut both apples in half with one stroke and only eat 3 of the halves.
Also throw in the metal fork you used to scrape your expensive non-stick pan.
Ok that reminded me of this joke:
A guy hears a knock on his door, he answers it and nobody's there. "Damn kids," he says. Then he notices a snail on the doormat, picks it up and throws it over the fence.
Six months later there's another knock on the door. When he answers it there's nobody there, but the snail is on the mat again. The snail looks up and says, "So... what was THAT all about?"
People who thought this was real - don't feel bad, it's a reference to Florida's REAL "Don't Say Gay" law, enacted in 2023, that bans the word from public schools.
That joyous moment in every father's life when you call your son a loser because he doesn't know all your tricks.
Bonespurs getting elected again, and I haven't overcome it yet.