Eylrid

Felis Catus 
is your taxonomic nomenclature 
An endothermic quadruped 
carniverous by nature 
Your visual, olfactory, 
and auditory senses 
Contribute to your hunting skills 
and natural defenses. 
I find myself intrigued 
by your sub-vocal oscillations 
A singular development 
of cat communications 
That obviates your 
basic hedonistic predilection 
For a rhythmic stroking of your fur 
to demonstrate affection. 
A tail is quite essential 
for your acrobatic talents 
You would not be so agile 
if you lacked its counterbalance 
And when not being utilized 
to aid in locomotion 
It often serves to illustrate 
the state of your emotion 
Oh Spot, 
The complex levels of behavior you display 
Denote a fairly well developed cognitive array 
And though you are not sentient, Spot, and do not comprehend 
I nonetheless consider you a true and valued friend.

Mildly related fact: More people die of drowning every year than have ever died from nuclear incidents including Nagasaki and Hiroshima

That's why we should have the right to listen to every phone call happening near us

How else are you supposed to print out your favorite videos?

He's going to shut down the whole Borg cube to steal the biological distinctiveness

Also doesthedogdie.com for a whole bunch of specific things you can check for

In my experience exhaustion makes the dread spiral worse

Archer is a secret agent who is afraid of alligators, crocodiles, and brain aneurysms. Burnham is a guy who healed the world with comedy from his bedroom.

I love Risa or RISA, or however the properly capitalized way it is.

Risa, it's the name of the vacation planet

I'll take "IQ is a flawed measure of intelligence, but intelligence is probably still normally distributed"

grabs popcorn to watch inevitable argument about mean vs median

Oh you haven't lived until you've slept in waxed sheets