this post was submitted on 19 Dec 2023
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No Stupid Questions

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I want to give them money but since my childhood my parents pretty much told me that they are all either faking it or are too lazy to go to work for money. I mean, I guess they can go to work but not everyone gets accepted to work as easy as it sounds like.

(page 2) 47 comments
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[–] xc2215x 2 points 1 year ago

To a certain degree it is normal.

[–] [email protected] -3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Sorry to tell you but your parents are capitalist assholes who lack basic empathy.

[–] SocialMediaRefugee 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Must be hard being so much better than everyone else.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Where exactly did I say I was? I simply stated a fact, is all ...

[–] sizzler 1 points 1 year ago

SMR has already admitted they lack empathy elsewhere in the thread so no surprise you made then feel attacked.

[–] [email protected] -3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

You say that you feel bad, and that your parents have taught you this all your life, so I assume you're young and won't be too hard on you but to put it bluntly - that is a terrible and ignorant take, even though it's a feature, not a bug (and one that could impact your own family just as easily).

Homeless people are still people.

Many homeless people are in work, but even if they aren't, and gasp even if they use drugs (which I know you've never considered why they use, or have been in a situation where your life is that hard your only chance to rest from it for a minute is by doing drugs), and even if they use whatever money they get to buy those drugs, they deserve the same basic decency and agency you would show any other human being. 9 times out of 10 they'll be using the money to pay for a bed in a shelter for the night or some food of their choosing (which you'd know if you'd ask them).

Giving a homeless person money (or even the nod you're so averse to) lets them know that another human has seen them, and has seen them as a fellow human, not some crap on the street to be ignored or looked down on because they make you feel bad.

Once you start placing conditions on your kindness/donation ("no money they'll use it for drugs", or "here, have this stale food I've been carrying around for weeks in case I run in to someone like you. your dietary requirement, never mind likes or dislikes are irrelevant to me!", or even "let me buy you something to eat"), you're making it about you, taking away the last bit of agency many of these people have, and completely lose sight of the person you claim you want to help. At that point - walk away, the only person who might benefit is you, which means you've used a homeless person to boost your own ego.

The best advice I could give you is to start talking to people who already support homeless people. Once you've hopefully gained some understanding of homelessness and a little empathy to those dealing with it, then and only then could you start talking to directly to homeless people, as I said above, even if you can't give them money, the sincere acknowledgment that they exist and are as deserving as anyone else of human interaction and kindness will show them that at least someone cares.

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