this post was submitted on 12 Oct 2023
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cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ca/post/7071122

cross-posted from: https://kbin.social/m/[email protected]/t/533670

The owners of the store at Tipton Gas Bar in Lake Cowichan, B.C., were baffled when a black bear walked in and stole a bag of gummy bears.

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[–] Fredselfish 52 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Thought title was a setup to joke. Man crazy. Can it eat gummy bears?

[–] constnt 23 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)
[–] tdawg 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

The bears digestive track. I went to Alaska for a week a while back and we actually learned about how the local bears eat. Eventually a bear's canines (or whatever teeth they use for meat tearing) will wear down to stubs making it impossible for them to eat meat. When this happens they will start to exclusively eat plant matter. Unfortunately this is also what ends up killing them. A young bear typically eats plant matter to slow down their digestive track for the winter. But in the case of an older bear they eat so much that their digestion literally backs up until it kills them

[–] RedEyeFlightControl 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I thought this was c/dadjokes too

[–] Fredselfish 2 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

This is world news but when I steal a bag of sour patch kids it's just a violation of my parole or w/e

[–] PowerGloveSoBad 9 points 1 year ago

Cannibalism

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Nothing but this bear theft happened today. It was the only thing of note in the entire world.

[–] Carighan 2 points 1 year ago

Didn't some TV station one broadcast that fuck all happened that day, anywhere?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Cute story until you realize the bear will be euthanized

[–] Gradually_Adjusting 3 points 1 year ago

Haribo has a posse

[–] jarfil 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

Didn't "euthanasia" apply to "individuals getting help to fulfill their death wish"? I don't think the bear wants to die, if anything it will get murdered, as in "premeditated taking of a life, against the target's wishes".

[–] OrteilGenou 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

You don't take on a pack of wild gummy bears and come out alive. That bear had a death wish, sure as shootin.

[–] thorbot 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

How do you know the bear's wishes? Did you ask him?

[–] jarfil 1 points 1 year ago

Suicide by ~~cop~~ vet, you say? That bear needs counseling!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

No?

put (a living being, especially a dog or cat) to death humanely.

[–] jarfil 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

"Humanely" implies a reason that isn't just because it behaved not how you wanted it. That's called "sacrificing" or at best "killing", like when you want to eat steak but the cow insists on breathing.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I don't want the bear to die. But that doesn't change that the word doesn't imply consent.

[–] jarfil 1 points 1 year ago

The word literally means "good death", meaning for a good reason. Consent is one such reason, terminal illness is another, stealing gummy bears... is not.

[–] Gingerlegs 5 points 1 year ago
[–] postmateDumbass 1 points 1 year ago

A gas station bar?

Free shooter with 10 gal fill up?