this post was submitted on 04 Aug 2023
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[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 years ago

Of course the actual figures for God must be expected to be much higher, since the source is known to be biased in His favour

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 years ago (3 children)

What about the Great Flood? That must've killed hundreds of millions.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Literal reading of Bible puts Great Flood at 2348 BCE, total population of Earth at this time is roughly estimated to be between 20 to 40 million.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

Not as much as atheists like evil zedong!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Well, that's still quite the body count.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago (1 children)

God's k/d ratio through the years has been insane

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

However since unlike god, Satan didn't die (from what we know), Satan has a k/d ratio of infinity. Another W for big S

[–] Zehzin 12 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

I read somewhere that at a 1.5% per year average population growth, by the time of the flood happens in the story there would be like over half a billion people alive. I haven't checked the math or the facts.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 years ago (1 children)

In a bet with god over if Job is only following god because his life is great. Satan asks for god's permission, then kills Job's family.

[–] RivenRise 11 points 2 years ago

So really it was gods fault

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago

Better than John Wick.

[–] TheGiantKorean 13 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

He was spawn camping during war in heaven

[–] BarrelAgedBoredom 9 points 2 years ago

It's a legitimate strategy!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago

Retirement going great, just chilling out, taking vacations, having fun with the grandkids...

God teleports behind you

[–] oryx 8 points 2 years ago

Hail Satan!

[–] marche_ck 6 points 2 years ago

Call me revisionist, but I believe God just Isekaied them, it's not murder! 👍