Autism

I don't have ADHD, but I'm autistic.

I too have two organization systems. But I realized that what seems chaotic, has actually a precise order. My closet is organized in a specific way, but my work desk looks like a mess, however, change something of my chaotic desk and I will notice. And will take me some sweet time to recover from it.

With social events I was like that too, but given some time, I learned that it's not worth it. When I feel like going to a party, I remember the noise, the lights, the people, and remember how stressful they are. I don't like parties anymore, and don't get that urge anymore, but I still have days in which I want to be "social". That is for me the hardest urge to "solve", as I struggle with other humans same way you are.

Loud and clear. My collections are meticulously organized. My desk is a disaster area. My bedroom is dusty but clutter-free. The dining room looks like a hoarder house exploded.

The upshot to having severe depression on top of AuDHD is that none of it feels like it matters much anymore. ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

Same hare (just autism here). My bedroom total mess and sometimes looks like a twister went trough it, but if i fill my dishwasher, hang up clothes or cook everyghing need to be perfect ans just so.

I'm totally the same. My room is mostly a wreck but I could manage everything about 3 bike shops all at the same time with precision and efficiency.

When I did auto body work, I had everything I needed on carts within arm's reach. That is where I got my speed. Each panel might take 100 operations to complete but I worked on 3-5 cars at the same time wheeling my carts and stool around to each one as fast as I could, meanwhile, my house was always a wreck and I couldn't find anything.

Same same. My work office is spotless and perfectly stocked at all times, my home desk is a collection box (pile) for important papers with some room for a mouse and keyboard. Kitchen and living room? perfectly organized, to the point I could tell you exactly where every tool and ingredient is within a 6 in square... My laundry however is.... Dear God... I'm working on it. Medicine cabinet is a pile of so many random drugs and medical tools but directly below is the perfectly, and I mean perfectly, folded and stacked AND organized by alternating color, towels. The weird part is, even in the "chaos" zones, I could still give you a shelf coordinate that would be accurate to within 12 inches of the item you're looking for. Ibuprofen? First shelf down from the top, front left side, next to the NyQuil, may need to move the bag of compression wraps out the way. The beeswax for candles? Top right cube of the laundry shelving, back left corner of that cube. Like..... Wtf brain? Why u know dis?!?!

I have ADHD and CPTSD, which among other things means I acquired autistic traits through a secret cheat code.

Yes, 100%. I have a three drawer nightstand. The drawers are meticulously organized while there's a pile of crap "pending organization" on the top. It has only grown over the course of months. Eventually I'll buckle down and do it but, until that fateful day, I'll have the most organized drawers in the North American continent.

Similar. I have both. However, not all autism is the same.

As for the social stuff, your skills are underdeveloped. It's like watching a toddler run because there are skills others developed at a much younger age. You may always struggle with it, but you can learn how to cope, and you can improve.

You can learn to watch for non verbal cues, learn when to listen vs talk. You can learn when to stop fact dumping and instead ask questions.

You aren't alone. It can get better. I would recommend watching some YouTube videos on communication and social skills.

Be interested in other people's journeys and skill sets. Perhaps people will think you're different, but they will like you.

Settle on an organization that objectively makes sense for you. Don't set unreasonable expectations for yourself.

I'm autistic but not ADHD (and can't think of a better way of starting this off). I definitely have to reorganize them soon because I've been lazy recently, but all my CDs, DVD, and games are organized alphabetically. Music files on my desktop/laptop are organized in folders named by artist followed by whatever subfolder(s) I need from there, which are auto alphabetized thankfully. Phone needs some major work getting that mess taken care of, though, which I totally wanna do but probably never will get around to due to having over 500 files on a single SD card.

Games are sorted by console/case size (PS2 cases > PS3 cases type of thing) as well since I have limited space in my bedstand things. I also keep all the manga I have just organized in a dresser drawer by keeping volumes from the same sets together, but not in alphabetical order if I remember correctly.

Other than those, and roughly where the dishes go in the kitchen and dishwasher, I am not super organized past the normal certain clothes types in certain drawers thing I assume most everyone does regardless of being autistic or not. Organization is something that kinda drains me a little since usually the things I'm organizing are a lots of smaller things (dishes not included because I have that down to a science on where things should go for the most part), so I try to keep things clean enough, even if that means foregoing good organization of things.

Not me, i have the same quality of organization for most things

As far as I know I don't have either (autism or adhd) but I find I can sorta be like this. Thing is I can be super organized but generally only if I have enough control of the area and time. I tend to be lazy but I am really good at packing or stacking things to maximize storage space. But like I have complete control of my laptop and its not organized but like since I can search and such I don't need it to be. but like I have an external drive which I keep very oganized and backed up.