this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2023
-6 points (28.6% liked)

Jokes

3568 readers
27 users here now

Lemmy users' attempts at being funny

Welcome to the funniest community on Lemmy! The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:

Rules

1- Bigotry, sexualization of minors, and hate speech are not allowed.

2- Links of any kind are not allowed in posts. All NSFW or NSFL content must have a proper Content Warning.

3- Remember to treat your fellow users with kindness and respect. Repeated violations will result in a ban.

4- Any attempts at advertising, company/personal promotion, and spamming will result in a ban.

Sister Communities

Comedy Heaven

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Mental Health

To partner with our community and be included here, you are free to message me or comment on our pinned post.

Community Moderation

For inquiry on becoming a moderator of this community, you may comment on the pinned post of the time.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

Says he gotta pitch. VC says go ahead.

"So we first, we take the money and we go to the least developed part of the world and we pay some people to kidnap some small children and force the inhabitants to sign over their land rights. Then we get some other people to write up some reports that say there's gold in the hills and we raise a bunch more money. "Then we just basically, we build an island where we hire loyal guards, I have a guy he says he can do an implant that'll make them loyal, we can use those villagers. And we just build a fort and we only let hot chicks and people with sweet jetskis come. "Anyways we stock up on guns and stuff and wait for it all to burn and then we rule the world, we do anything we want!"

VC says, "That's an incredibly immoral idea, we love it, in fact, we've already been working on this for some time. What do you call this start up anyways?"

"The Aristechrats"

top 4 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Diprount_Tomato 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] JTode 0 points 1 year ago

Thank you for the validation of feeling the need to tell me, friend. Good luck selling that startup pitch!

[–] Little8Lost 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

i was confused of your double quotes inside the double quotes
"at least "to me it makes no sense" if you unserstand what i mean"

[–] JTode 2 points 1 year ago

It was mostly the pun, probably I should've put it in Dad Jokes cause I also did not go nearly far enough in the techbro excesses.

I'm okay with the downvotes, jokes are not my stock in trade, I just needed to get it out somewhere so I could stop writing it in my head.