Nothing, my dad sucks.
this post was submitted on 17 Jun 2023
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UKCasual
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I'm with you here, I have a very complicated guilt filled relationship with my dad and often this time of year causes issues. I always think it's nice to focus on the positive father figures or even mentors in your life and reach out to show appreciation and know none of this is on you!
Eh it's been 11 years since he went off the rails so I'm pretty much over it. Sucks around his bday but on weekends like this I'm mostly just happy to not have to spend time and money on an awkward meal out like most people I know. Gonna lounge in pyjamas instead and nobody can even make me feel bad for it lol.
Honestly I admire you so much for this. I am feeling the guilt to go have to spend time with my dad over spending time with my partner (who is an amazing dad). As you say it's always awkward and toxic but still the guilt remains. Great that are prioritising yourself, have a wonderful weekend!
Well I hope that whatever you do, it's as bearable as possible and you get to come home to your awesome partner asap. I don't know your situation so can't comment any further on that, just remember your feelings in all of this matter too.
Thank you, yours to. Hope you have a lovely weekend!
same here, I haven't heard from him in 8 years, not sure if he's still alive
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My dad ran out on us when i was a toddler. So yeah. That's how my father's day is gonna be.
In the best traditions of British understatement....that's a bit of a bugger :(
Sorry to hear that, best to treat yourself extra kindly on sunday.
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Bought a part to fix his car door window mechanism and told him I'll fix it. I don't really know a thing about fixing cars so he'll probably be losing a window.
Hah! I hope not, and wish you luck fixing the door. It's a very thoughtful idea, I think we couild all use a few less chores and jobs to sort out!
I got him a bag of coffee. Unfortunately I then discovered another bag of coffee I got him for the last occasion that I forgot to give him
So a trip to John Lewis later and he's got a rice cooker. Luckily my sister isn't in the city so as long as I see him I win by default
It doesn't always have to be a competition you know!
(says the oldest grandchild, whose grandmother has drunkenly confirmed that means she'll always automatically be the favourite 🕶 )
Hah win by default, well congratulations on thay. Also rice cookers are amazing, we use ours way more than we thought we would.
My dad died last year so nothing. But… I didn’t ever get him anything. He was of the opinion that he had a birthday and that was enough and that Father’s Day was just an excuse to sell cards.
Personally, I like receiving gifts and my kids are still kids so they get excited by proxy. I like single malt whisky so there’s always that (though obviously their mum has to get involved).
And I like to cook (come and check out https://feddit.uk/c/cooking_with_fire if you’re into barbecue of any sort!) So there’s always some little gadget or ingredient (hot sauce or something). They can get me.
I'm sorry for you loss!
My partner is the same, likes getting things from our kid. It's very cute seeing father's day from their perspective. My partner is very into bbqing (although it always brings on rain) so thanks for your suggestion.
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You guys got dads? Damn your Lucky
Socks....but he actually asked
I love getting socks.
Socks are awesome
Socks are awesome and you've got to think he knows what he wants! You can get fancy sock subscriptions now
Yep my dad always asks for socks and liquorice allsorts. Every damn year, for birthday too.
He obviously knows what he wants! You can get sock subscriptions, maybe find one with fancy patterns
I usually get a bottle of whatever spirit he's low on. Slightly ironic in that he has almost every spirit but the personal kind.
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I get my dad every year what he always wanted.
A life without me in it.
Sorry to hear that, it can be a very complicated time to year. Best to be extra kind to yourself!
Was chatting to a friend of mine last night who bought his dad a set of canvas prints of family pets over the years which is remarkably thoughtful and made me feel a bit shit about getting mine a moonpig card and a bottle of rum.
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I love your caveat. My relationship with my dad is very complex, and it brings me so much anxiety to go through father's day every year. Same for mother's day, but father's day is upcoming so it's more pressing for me right now.
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Luckily there's a lot of Mandalorian merch out there and my dad is really into that. Pretty easy this year!
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Nothing… he’s getting a card which is all I can afford 🤣
I'm with you - card only gang all the way.
That's more than enough, no one should be stressing themselves financially for father's day!
My other half and kid got me a Father's Day card and gift (whoopee cushion) last week. Their mistake; I expect another this week!
Hah! I'm sure your kid will love having a second father's day - you might have to re-remind them!
A bunch of unique hot sauces. Last time I saw him he seemed to be experimenting and enjoying different ones, assumed I should... spice it up, rather than the usual chocolates.
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Not everywhere in the world.
Maybe this isn't the right thing to do considering this is casualuk, but because it's showing at the top of all, and many users are new and don't yet automatically look at the sub name, I want to put a small reminder:
Fathers day is on Sunday the 18th in America. Also the 19th is a federal holiday.
Carry on friends across the pond, just want to prevent fediverse newbies from panicking.
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Nope, but it is in the UK. Always confusing to see reminders when it's actually for another place!
I didn’t get my dad a gift, just popped a card in the post. Now I’m thinking maybe I’m a crap daughter and I’ll ruminate on that for a while.
I'm popping out to get a card this morning, and a stamp, and I'll have to sign it and post it before last post so it stands a chance of getting there only a little late.
Dad knows I am there for him when the shit hits the fan. He's visiting my sister tomorrow.
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I usually get him some nice beer.
Sounds like a great idea! All the dads in my life seem to like IPA at the moment
The man loves haggis, so I've managed to find haggis spiced chocolate. Not sure if it's a good idea but should get a laugh
That is an amazing idea! Have you tried some already? I can't even imagine what that'll be like
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A red wine which is hopefully decent. I had to text and ask him though as I never really know what he would want, and I know he doesn't care much about the holiday. I've not been the best in terms of making the effort to see him lately so popping round for a bit of lunch today to drop it off.
It's difficult to find time in modern life, everything is so busy and rushed. I'm sure he'll love the wine and the visit!
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