You assume a lot about my "special someone".
ShowerThoughts
Sometimes we have those little epiphanies in the shower.. sometimes they come from other places. This is a home for those epiphanies.
They mean: penis.
Do it.
Not just with your SO. Do it with your family, your pets, your close friends. Get as touchy with them as both feel comfortable with, spend time with them, tell them that you like their company. (Yes, even to the pets. They might not understand what you say but they're quite good at detecting your emotions.)
My special someone will never know me. It is the greatest gift to not find them and put them through what I will be going through before I'm gone. Everything I had to offer someone was stollen from me over 10 years ago. I occasionally dream otherwise, but then reality kicks in. One can only ever expect what they are able to give. I've always believed in that aphorism, even when it is brutal to myself.
No one can ever take you away from you. Offering your time, effort, and company you can provide is the only thing the “right” person could ever want.
Navigating through pain, doubt, and regrets from the past while dealing with the future is complex, and often messy. None of that ever subtracts from you, though. There’s an essence of who you are that is inextricable from your existence.
Cheers!