this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2024
46 points (96.0% liked)

Toilet Paper USA

239 readers
1 users here now

founded 10 months ago
MODERATORS
 

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/17911181

It's not true, folks. The lying liberal media wants you to think he'd shag a settee. That he'd bone a book stand. That he's creamied on the credenza.

Don't trust them. My beautiful boy JD, he'd never do it! He's chaste with the chaises. He's never loved a loveseat.

My VP would never fuck furniture.

top 8 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Got_Bent 17 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I had to go looking for some context as this was new to me. I found this picture and laughed out loud in public

[–] pete_the_cat 4 points 4 months ago (1 children)

For others wondering: in his book he admitted to fucking a rubber glove that was stuck in the couch somehow.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 months ago

He didn't actually say it in his book. It was a joke that turned into a widespread rumor but it doesn't mention fucking a couch a single time in the book...

That being said... There no way to prove that he DIDN'T fuck the couch. He just didn't write about it in his book.

[–] MeaanBeaan 4 points 4 months ago

The funniest thing to me is that they think we actually believe it to be true. These memes are hilarious because he just feels like a couch fucker. Regardless of whether or not he has fucked a couch he definitely gives off the vibe.

[–] edgemaster72 3 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

"Never to completion in"... so he pulls out on the pull out?

[–] Omega_Man 3 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Fake new. There is no IKEA in Cleveland. The rest is prob true .

[–] Repelle 2 points 4 months ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago