this post was submitted on 05 May 2024
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Science Memes

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[–] shalafi 28 points 10 months ago (1 children)

They're easy to swat. Two things: They always launch backwards and the react to shadows.

Creep slow from behind. If you have to cause a shadow, move very slowly. They jump into your fist.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Fist? You're PUNCHING flies?!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

OH! I'd do a jojo's reference so bad

[–] [email protected] 23 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Physical attacks, as opposed to what? Chemical warfare?

[–] [email protected] 29 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Isn't that pretty much it? You can buy chemical warfare sprays at your local store, flies aren't covered under the Geneva convention.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago
[–] acetanilide 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Article I: General Principles

  1. Respect for Life: Parties to the Geneva Convention on Engagement with Flies (GCEF) shall respect the inherent value of all fly life and seek to minimize harm to flies whenever possible.

  2. Proportionality: All actions taken against flies must be proportionate to the threat posed and aimed at achieving a legitimate military objective, such as protecting public health or preventing harm to humans or animals.

Article II: Rules of Engagement

  1. Prevention and Deterrence: Parties shall take all reasonable measures to prevent fly infestations and deter flies from entering areas where they may pose a threat to human health or safety.

  2. Non-lethal Measures: Parties shall prioritize the use of non-lethal methods for controlling flies, such as fly swatters, fly traps, and insect repellents, whenever feasible.

  3. Minimum Force: When lethal force is necessary, parties shall use the minimum force required to neutralize the threat posed by flies, taking care to avoid collateral damage to non-combatants and civilian property.

  4. Protection of Civilians: Parties shall take all necessary precautions to protect civilians from harm during fly control operations, including providing advance warning when possible and avoiding the use of chemical agents that may pose risks to human health.

  5. Treatment of Captured Flies: Parties shall treat captured flies humanely and refrain from subjecting them to unnecessary suffering or cruel treatment.

Article III: Humanitarian Considerations

  1. Medical Treatment: Parties shall provide prompt and appropriate medical treatment to individuals who have been bitten or otherwise harmed by flies, regardless of their nationality or affiliation.

  2. Humanitarian Access: Parties shall facilitate the delivery of humanitarian assistance, including medical supplies and insecticides, to populations affected by fly infestations, in accordance with international humanitarian law.

Article IV: Compliance and Enforcement

  1. Compliance: Parties to the GCEF shall comply with its provisions in good faith and take all necessary measures to ensure that their personnel understand and adhere to these rules of engagement.

  2. Monitoring and Reporting: Parties shall establish mechanisms for monitoring compliance with the GCEF and reporting any violations or incidents of concern to the relevant authorities.

  3. Accountability: Parties responsible for violations of the GCEF shall be held accountable for their actions and, where appropriate, provide compensation to victims for any harm caused.

Article V: Conclusion

The Geneva Convention on Engagement with Flies reaffirms the commitment of the international community to uphold humanitarian principles and protect the rights of all living beings, including flies. By adhering to these rules of engagement, parties can mitigate the impact of fly infestations while minimizing harm to both flies and humans.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I appreciate the effort that went into this 😀

[–] acetanilide 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I wish I could take credit for it, but sadly the only effort I made was convincing AI to make it for me 😞

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Ah I forget about AI 😆. Best to take credit for it anyway!

[–] acetanilide 2 points 10 months ago

Haha thank you! Don't mind if I do 🤣

[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago

Psionic attacks

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Is this an AI generated response? (just asking)

Edit: No. I mean, probably, but not by google.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

Certainly seems like it lol.

[–] p5yk0t1km1r4ge 5 points 10 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Step 1: Get masters in chemistry

Step 2: ?????

Step 3: Use your newly invented fly killing gas nuke (harmless to humans and all other non fly life on planet earth, of course) and nuke the entire planet.

                    **PROFIT**
[–] itsnotits 1 points 10 months ago

Get master's* in chemistry

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

But can they survive temperatures above 40°C with little to no water like is what will probably happen to the majority of habitable land within the next century?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Can confirm. Tried to swat a fly, but the police broke my door instead

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

And most importantly, not worth money to humans.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

you clearly aren't a geneticist

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

Ugh, fine! I'll change it to "worth money" instead of "valuable." Will you understand then?

It's almost like words mean things.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

Feels like the author has something against flies