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Sovcit's employer is confused by sovcit. (lemmy.world)

submitted 6 months ago by BonesOfTheMoon to c/insanepeoplefacebook

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[–] homesweethomeMrL 71 points 6 months ago (6 children)

Hey all, hoping for some advise [sic] and direction here.

I was out on the lawn flapping my arms for about an hour, but I still wasn’t flying. I told gravity that as a supersentient being of virtue true I was no longer constrained by any mechanics quantum or admantium.

I think I got off the ground a couple of times, but obviously gravity can’t understand what I’m saying or else I’d be over Des Moines by now. My FreeFlight™ air wings have been ordered but I should still be able to defeat the laws of physics with my Natural Brane, right? Anyone done this already who can help??!

[–] [email protected] 25 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Ah, it's because you haven't read my book "Newton's Lie: How Big Gravity is Keeping Us Down". It's only $199.99 on my website. You'll also get a 50% discount for a subscription to my monthly podcast "What Birds Don't Want You To Hear", so it'll only be $39.99 per month.

[–] TexasDrunk 5 points 6 months ago

Those are great resources. Just don't forget to come to my website where I sell all the parts for firearms, bombs, and stills but no firearms, bombs, or stills to purchase the paperwork you need to fly over the US as a Natural Flyer. We prepare it all for you so that you don't have to worry.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

If Big Gravity didn't illegally hold down the truth, your book would fly off the shelves (literally).

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