That’s not quite the same thing though because you’re talking about giving another group of people preferential treatment over everyone else.

Obviously. I'm explaining how people with a flawed mindset think, not defending that mindset.

But what things like abortion laws give people is the right to self-determination

Also obviously true. There are some common-sense counterpoints (basically, anti-choice folks don't act like abortion is murder, they pretend that it is, and that shows their lie), but if a person genuinely thought abortion was literally murder, it becomes an apple-to-apple comparison to their broken alt-right point of view; and importantly, it's consistent. Consistent viewpoints are often harder to rebut than ones with obvious self-contradictions.

In your example it’s like saying that exfelons have the right to have their record sealed once they’ve served their time. They’re not given preferential treatment they’re just equalized to everyone else.

That's why I didn't use that example. I'm trying to show why certain twisted beliefs are consistent enough for millions of people to hold them. If my example were ex-felons (while it is a somewhat more appropriate comparison) it would not lead to an internally consistent viewpoint.

As I said to the other commentor, my explanation isn't about trying to defend that user's parents to him. It's trying to help him understeand, a basis through which they can perhaps decide what to do next, or not do next.