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What "little" experiences changed the way you percieved things ? (self.asklemmy)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by needthosepylons to c/[email protected]

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Idk if "little experience" means something in English, but what I meant is non-life changing/threatening. Things that would otherwise go unnoticed.

For me, it was when I stopped drinking acoholic beverages because.. I ended up finding it boring, I guess.

I started noticing how low key hostile my environment is towards people who dont drink. People started thinking I was sick, depressed, converted to islam, being snob, etc.

Bartenders started to openly mock me when I asked for a lemonade (they still do) : "We dont do that here", "Go to a physician if you need that", "you're in a bar you know ?".

I started realizing how hostile my country/region/groups can be to people who dont drink. Never realized that before.

Edit : typo

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[–] ritswd 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I don’t think it was a false good idea, it seems like it was a pretty good plan. Unfortunately, what we know now is that you overshot, and you’re not gonna get the outcome you were going for, for either your plan A or plan B. It really sucks, I’m sorry for you.

Now, there’s no point dwelling on the could-have-beens. The only thing that matters now is what you can get moving forward, in this new world where we know what we know.

To be clear: I’m not telling you for sure whether you should accept or reject the offer, I don’t know enough about your situation to be sure. What I’m sure of is that whatever decision you make, if dwelling on “what could have been” is a major factor in the decision, that’s for sure a mistake to let it influence you. When you look back at it with hindsight, the dwelling will have gone away, you will have moved on, all you’ll see will be what you had for yourself at this point in time. Basically, don’t make future-you, who will have let go of the feelings of disappointment by then, regret the decision you’re making now.

[–] needthosepylons 1 points 1 year ago

Thanks again for sharing your thoughts (even though yes, yes can only be based on an incomplète picture, but still !)

I think I understand what you mean and I agree I wouldn't want to act based on "what could have been". I think I'm currently actively looking for stability, be it at the expense of other aspects. Whether it's a good or bad thing in the long run is another story, and one I'm currently doubting about, but what's certain is, let's say a month ago, I was 100% commited to that choice, with the benediction of future me.

So I guess that's something..! Anyway, thanks for helping me put things into perspective, kind and wise stranger :)