Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
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This community is supportive of DIY HRT. Unsolicited medical advice or caution being given to people on DIY will result in moderator action.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
To make such a request, at the start of the body of your post, not in the title, the first line should look like the this: [Requesting Engagement from _________]
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
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Another cis woman, and my advice is similar. As the previous comment says, lipstick on its own is way harsh on anyone! Hold off on lipstick (try some lip gloss instead! You presumably missed out on the lip gloss era of your childhood that many girls go through after all) and for now maybe focus more on the eyes, specifically eyeshadow and eye liner. As far as makeup goes these are relatively gender neutral compared to say lipstick or mascara, so they might be less dysphoria-triggering. Check Google images for searches along the lines of "men with eye makeup" and you'll find a good spread of masculine, feminine, and gender-queer inspo. Generally I recommend makeup newbies (with light or mid-tone skin) start with neutral tones for eyeshadow: a medium brown, a dark brown, and a gold or copper for some fun. For eye liner pick something in the browns: a little lighter if you have light hair and a little darker if you have dark hair. Black can be really harsh unless you have black hair, and navy and other colors are expert-level makeup. If you have darker skin, however, it's actually easier to jump into bright colors because you're working with a dark "canvas," which makes for better contrast. Not to say that blue, purple, and green are off-limits for light-skinned folks, but you have to worry more about skin tone clashes so it's trickier than sticking with neutral colors at first. Reds and pinks are intermediary difficulty and a good first color to play around with. Regardless of color start with a light application; like the other comment says, you'll look unbalanced if you apply one element of makeup heavy without applying everything heavy. Also it's really common to get bad advice at the makeup counter, so while they can be helpful in guiding you if you're completely lost, take what they say with a grain of salt and trust your own judgement of what looks good. Also keep in mind they can only recommend what they stock; as an example I've needed to bring my own eyebrow powder before when having my makeup professionally done for a special event because too many times I've found anything other than one specific shade from one specific company looks really weird on me.
Tl;dr: don't despair, makeup is hard
This is really helpful, thank you!