this post was submitted on 01 Nov 2023
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Birds aren’t real
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They used to be. Until the U.S. Government replaced them with drone replicas designed to spy on the American public. Founded in 1976.
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Two weeks ago, a pigeon flew through one of the glass panes in my garage door, spraying broken glass all the way across my garage. It took hours to find and clean all of the mess. The pigeon left unharmed. This sounds about right.
Impacts with glass often cause internal injuries like concussions. It probably flew away and looked fine but died shortly afterward.
I kind of assumed that, but I haven't found it anywhere, so I like to think it went on living its idiot life. When I was getting some of the larger pieces into the trash can, I had to use a hammer to break it down. Sometimes, I had to hit it 2 or 3 times to get it to break. I wasn't swinging it like Thor would, but still...that "bird" could not have been fine even though it flew away.
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Testing the barriers for weak spots