this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2023
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Mildly Infuriating

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https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/pvz8rm/my_grandmas_lunch_at_her_new_senior_living/

Special thanks to @[email protected] for pointing out how mobile links from reddit have tracking

And @[email protected] for showing me how to clean links.

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[–] Azamandriel 55 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

I worked for years in a nursing home and I can tell you that it is total bullshit. Everything is the lowest quality at the highest markup. Let me assure you that the staffing at 99% of these places is so low that the residents are waiting 20-30 min to use the restroom and basically live trapped in a bed with little to no assistance.

[–] berkeleyblue 30 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I just talked with a coworker about this today. Her dad lost his leg because they failed to respond to a foot infection and they then also blamed him for not telling them soon enough… It’s disgusting how we treat the elderly in those facilities (and here we pay double those 3k btw…) I was forced to work in a nursing home for 2 months as part of my civil duty (military service substitution). I couldn’t do it anymore, it just kills you how they treat some people. Those are grown adults and I was told they can’t have a small knife to cut vegetables, not because they were unsafe with them but just as a matter of policy. Others where given clothes to fold that afterwards where thrown back into the same bucket that they came from to be folded again tomorrow. They were lied to and treated with less respect than little kids… And then the whole COVID thing in addition to that where they couldn’t see anyone and had to endure this idiocy basically 24/7.

I really never thought about suicide but if I end up in such a facility when I’m old, I might have to reevaluate my stance on that… that’s not living, that’s dying in installments while being drained of your money….

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I'll never forget one time when I was visiting my grandmother (living in a nursing home with memory issues and a lack of control of the other side of her body due to cerebral hemorrhage). When we arrived in her room, she was actually in the toilet shouting for someone to help her get out of there. I don't know how long she had to sit on the toilet - or how much longer she would've had to if we did not come visit right then.

It's not a life worth living at that point, I wouldn't wish that on anyone. You're just being kept alive for the sake of being alive, regardless of the quality. Euthanasia needs to be legalized everywhere.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

My mom recently had a stroke. She said the same thing about never wanting to be in a nursing home.

She will never have independence again. She has no money or retirement. That means she gets placed in a home that accepts Medicaid here in the US. These are the worst of the worst. If they gave my mom a button to push that would end her life, I am certain she would push it rather than go where she is going.

But she physically can’t do anything so her taking her own life isn’t possible now

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago

When my grandmother was unable to live on her own we moved her up to where we live. She had a good amount of money stashed away, so shopped every nice facility in town, and picked what seemed like the nicest one. While I would say the food didn't look as terrible as the picture in the OP, it wasn't much better. Multiple other issues at these places though, staff not helping, not giving meds on time, falling and not getting assistance for hours. One of the worst was falling, having to go to the hospital, and never letting emergency contacts know. We found out when the hospital called, because her charts didn't seem to match up. Turns out they sent the wrong charts to the hospital. Thank god she didn't have any allergies. We ended up moving her to another facility that was even more expensive, and promised none of these things would happen there. Turns out that wasn't true, so my parents finally ended up moving to a new home where they could finish the basement and build an apartment for her with full time care hired to come by.

I used to always think if you had the financial part of old age figured out you'd be okay, boy was I wrong.