Asklemmy

43489 readers

2328 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

Open-ended question
Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

Lemmyverse: community search
sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
[email protected]: a community for finding communities

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~

founded 5 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

When you vet someone for whether you can be close friends with them, what's a seemingly unimpactful characteristic about someone that would instantly rule them out as a potential close friend for you? (lemm.ee)

submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

48 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Maybe you don't like the wording, but everyone does this. Unless you know if someone will be a close friend the moment you lay eyes on them, or are friends with literally everyone you've spent time with.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yes everyone does it naturally and mostly subconsciously over time as they get to know people. You've got to be a real psycho to be running through a checklist you've crowd sourced online. Wtf is this thread. Ugh reddit refugees lmao.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I personally doubt OP is going to actually use the answers like that.

[–] TheAlbacor 3 points 1 year ago

Yep, not having any standards for who you spend your time with can have bad consequences. This is very clearly not referring to something as ludicrous as pulling their credit score.

[–] [email protected] -3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

At least for me, there's never really any conscious stage of vetting people. It's just a long process of repeated interactions, and eventually some of them become friends and others don't. There's no grand registrar of friendship that I file people into for processing.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Then it's unconscious. Hopefully the criteria are ones you'd agree with if they were conscious.