Not The Onion

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Trump Seeks to Review Classified Evidence at His Own Secure Facility (www.nytimes.com)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by InverseParallax to c/nottheonion

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Your honor, I would like the opportunity to interview the underaged girl accusing me of rape, privately in my basement, so we can try to reenact the crime and confirm her testamony.

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[–] Carighan 35 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I mean I would go along with it, maliciouscompliance style.

"So you want to review the evidence?"
"Yes"
"In a secure facility?"
"Yes"
"On your own?"
"Well, maybe with my lawyer..."
"Alright, defendent will be locked up together with their lawyer according to their own wishes."