this post was submitted on 04 Aug 2023
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[–] MiddleWeigh 51 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

My view from my window(they gave me one of the big rooms all by myself, the only one with windows, ptsd i think) was OK. Middle of nowhere farm and small Appalachian Mt chain. We had to sneak onto a ps3 to use youtube lol. One night i was watching lighting rolling around the sky and hills thru my big window, laying on my back, reflecting off the ceiling. I cried so hard, it was beautiful.

The rehab sucked. It really did. But I had so much fun. They tried to take our communal volleyball game over some bullshit and we flipped shit and got everyone riled up. We kept our fkn volleyball. ..it was a state run rehab with everyone fresh out of jail. Never laughed so hard in my life.

I'm almost 1.5 years clean from a decade+ run on fent and benzos. Wouldn't trade my experiences for the world, but I'm glad I'm myself now. Things are still fucked up, and they'll always be for me, but I'm working on it..

It really is whatever you want it to be. Make it for yourself. <3

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago

I’m glad I’m myself now

Man, that one hits hard... congrats on the recovery and best of luck for your jorney onward!

[–] freehugs 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Thank you for sharing this, i really appreciate it.

[–] MiddleWeigh 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Of course! Ngl I'm crying a little right now. It means alot to me that I could share an experience of mine with you, cause its all I have, and I can more than imagine your thoughts and feelings right now. That view is beautiful. I'm sure you are a beautiful person too. I feel quite confident in that assumption actually. (:

[–] freehugs 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Man, I knew it was going to be hard, but these first few days have been hell. Crying every night, throwing up, anxiety attacks... all the good stuff. My admission wasn't even addiction related, but I feel you. I'm glad you made it into/through rehab and that you're better now. If it were easy we wouldn't have landed there in the first place. And ya, the view and fresh air definitely help, prolly more than I'm aware.

All the best to you, too!