Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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I've been self-hosting Pleroma (Mastodon) for a while as a technical challenge and because I thought it would help. But truth is finding content was a nightmare, and apart from that it was taking all the resources in my machine, and also was receiving network requests like crazy.
In comparison, for Lemmy I just joined a big instance and the experience has been much much better.
I think finding content is the key component of OP's question. If you host an instance that has only your own subscriptions, the content will feel light, but the extra load on other instances will be minimal and at their convenience. If you load your instance with popular communities so that your All feed pops up weird and interesting content, then the extra load on other instances will be much larger than your personal browsing.