Crazy Ideas

Ok, so......I was just watching some youtube videos, right? Turns out gorillas are amazing. The gorillas at your zoo remember you. They act different around zoo regulars. They enjoy seeing the regulars, as if they're friends. They can tell the difference between a child actually crying as opposed to a child PRETEND to cry. They get worried when their regulars children are crying for real. It stresses them, because they're behind a glass wall, and can't comfort the child. They put their hand against the glass as if to show they want to be there for the crying child. But if the "crying child" were just faking, the gorillas would sense it was fake, and they'd play and roll around. As if to be part of the fun. So gorillas are really smart who understand the world they're seeing. They have empathy. They see life the way people do.

And dolphins are some of the other smartest creatures on earth. They have sex for the pleasure of it, rather than the mating, and are some of the only creatures on earth known to be smart enough to experience that. So they'll rape you. Make of that what you will.

And then I watched a video of a cat, on an airplane, looking out the window. But the video sucked, because the cat had no concept of what it was looking at when it looked out the window. It was just like "uhhhh.....ok? Some patchy green stuff. Great moving painting. Why are you showing me this?

But I'm thinking, what if we brought a gorilla and a dolphin onto an airplane? I don't even know HOW you get the dolphin to be able to see outside. Maybe it's a custom built airplane with the whole lower half being transparent, and serves as a water tank for the dolphin? I guess?

But the gorilla could just look out the window.

See these are the kinds of science experiments we need to be conducting. Someone contact FOX. I'm sure we could/should film this. Alternatively, hey PBS.....wanna get weird?

You KNOW you gotta see the look on the gorillas face when it realizes "Wait......how the fuck are we this high up??? WHAT is happening right now???"

Even better if you could do that thing where they nosedive and do the zero gravity thing.

Wait......should we bring a gorilla and a dolphin into SPACE??? HEY NASA!!! WHO WANTS TO DO ENOUGH DRUGS TO MAKE THIS IDEA SOUND GOOD ENOUGH TO GREENLIGHT???