Programmer Humor

20954 readers

2993 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

Keep content in english
No advertisements
Posts must be related to programming or programmer topics

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

685

Development Methods (lemmy.ml)

submitted 1 day ago by cm0002 to c/[email protected]

51 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] [email protected] 68 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Waterfall only works if the programmer knows what the client needs. Usually it goes like:

Client has a need
Client describes what they think they need to a salesperson
Salesperson describes to the product manager what an amazing deal they just made
Product manager panics and tries to quickly specify the product they think sales just sold
Developers write the program they think product manager is describing
The program doesn’t think. It just does whatever buggy mess the programmer just wrote
The client is disappointed, because the program doesn’t solve their needs

[–] [email protected] 5 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

Eventually Company decides "agile will fix things"
Developers are told to work agile but the only stakeholder they talk to is the PO, who talks to PM, who talks to Sales, who talks to Customers
PM&Sales don't want to deliver an unfinished/unpolished product so they give a review every sprint, by themselves, based on what they think the customer wants (they are Very Clever)
A year or two later the project is delivered and the customer is predictably unhappy.
Management says "how could this have happened!" and does it all over again.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

as someone who has made it through multiple 'agile transformations' in large companies: that's how it usually goes.

however, that is the problem with people being stuck in their way and people afraid of loosing their jobs. PO is usually filled with the previous teamlead (lower management, maybe in charge of 20 ppl). PM & Sales have to start delivering unfinished Products! how else are you going to get customer feedback while you can still cheaply change things? A lot of the middle management has to take something they would perceive as a 'demotion' or find new jobs entirely - who would have guessed that with an entirely new model you cannot map each piece 1:1...

Given these and many more problems i have seen many weird things: circles within circles within circles, many tiny waterfalls... some purists would call SAFE a perversion of agile.

the point is: if you want to go agile, you have to change (who would have thought that slapping a different sticker won't do it?). the change has to start from the top. many companies try to do an 'agile experiment': the whole company is still doing what they do. however, one team does agile now - while still having to deliver in and for the old system...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 hours ago

I've seen so many companies force Agile without changing the management layer and style. Setting deadlines while demanding that teams work Agile. Insanity!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 hours ago

That’s what we use in my company: a series of mini waterfalls

[–] SlopppyEngineer 44 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

In terms of Mars

Client wants a robot to go to Mars
Project is budgeted and sold to send a Mars Rover
Work starts and after successful test the robot is shown to customer. Customer states he wants to send a Mechwarriors in a drop ship, not a little Pathfinder.
Panic, change requests, money being discussed, rockets are being strapped together with duct tape and the rover is bolted on an old Asimo that is being rebuilt into the smallest Mechwarrior ever the day before launch
Mech Asimo lands successfully, stumbles and falls on a rock after three steps
Customer disappointed