this post was submitted on 09 Feb 2025
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[โ€“] [email protected] 30 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Company-wide email: "We've had our best year ever and it's all thanks to YOU!"

Me: "Great. Can I have a raise?"

Company: "Oh, we can't afford THAT."

[โ€“] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago

Company: But you can finish work half an hour earlier this Friday, or stay and enjoy free pizza on us! Half a slice per person, max. No fancy toppings.