this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2023
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Fuck. One last bit of paperwork from my old workplace and I'm finally free of it. I'm still undecided as to whether I'll take a bunch of further action against them or not. I have nothing to gain and being vindictive is not in my nature. Justice however is a different matter. I'll seek some psuedo legal advice from one of my best friends who practised law for a long time, he's also been a life coach, mentor and father figure and I've always taken his advice, as it's usually so good.
Walked nearly 10ks yesterday. The body is getting used to it slowly. This sprained wrist is only healing very slowly and may be getting worse again. I bought a better support for it but the new job and constant use of my hands outside it means it's going to be a long haul I think.
Working again today and who knows when for the rest of the week. I'll manage financially for the time being and with any luck won't have to touch my savings. Just going to have live frugally for a while, which is fine. I have almost everything I need, so stopping having a disposable income won't be a big deal. Just have to quit wearing make up and buying expensive skin care products, which is also fine. There's peer pressure from other trans women a lot I find to "pass" meaning people can't know you're trans. It's bullshit pure and simple as far as I'm concerned. I'm happy that for some people that's what they want for themselves, but I've never bought into gender stereotypes and I'm not about to be bullied into starting buying into them. It's also really important to be visible at the moment I think as well. I'm not winning friends by being direct about my response to this, but I'm done with trying to be a people pleaser.
Thanks for reading, journalling here is therapy and its good to be regular with it so I can look back over this time down the track and see what I was doing and feeling and such....
Kthxbyte xo
One aspect of the old workplace situation might bear some consideration. Making a complaint or whatever, is the effect such has on the person that treated you so badly. Not a personal effect, but on the formal record. This makes it more possible for future employees of that person to have some warning of what that person has done before and might do again. So it's harder for the nasty person to say "I'm not the nasty person, it was them over there". One could call this an act of charity rather than being vindictive. Legal advice sounds like a good starting point to me.
Pretty soon I'll have the final paperwork sorted, so I'll phone the lgbtqia+ legal service for advice as well. The nightclub industry is rife with illegal behaviour. The culture of sexual harassment is gross and I brought it up with them many times and their failure to do anything emboldened a staff member to harass and sexually assault me. It wasn't a particularly bad assault but I'll also likely report that to police as it was the crux of all the issues and thier reluctance to take it seriously was a terrible lack of due process. While that didn't happen at work, it happened immediately after in my car, when I was giving them a fucking lift home. Also most the bullshit happened after I came out as trans.
big hugs
Thanks I'm over the worst of it thankfully.