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Pixel 4a fits most of these requirements but its almost 5 generations out of date and has no SD Card, + the extra security requires you to install a custom ROM like Calyx, Graphene, Lineage etc. and the hardware vendors no longer support them, so you dont get hardware updates, only OS.
You can use /e/OS or Muerena or whatever its called now on the 4a though. It kinda looks like iOS
I also like the Pixels and own a 4a. You're right, but I'd advise against buying it, due to it being end of life. You won't get proper security updates anymore. It dropped out of official support, and even some big aftermarket OS dropped support. So even the tinkerers amongst us should think twice before buying it.
I think OP be better off re-evaluating the requirements. They could get some USB-C headphones and buy a device with 256GB of storage. And that'd allow several decent and modern Android phones. Otherwise it's just complicated to find a proper phone these days and it likely includes paying extra and making other tradeoffs, when you could simply buy a pair of new headphones.
I got a Pixel 8a. That's slightly bigger, doesn't have headphone or sd-card but seems to be a nice device.