this post was submitted on 16 Jul 2023
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ADHD

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Thank you Nome @NomedaBarbarian

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@NomedaBarbarian on Twitter:

Thinking about how I've been lied to as an #ADHD person about what habits are.

That apparently is not what neurotypical folks get to experience.

Habits are things that they do without thinking.

They don't have to decide to do them. They don't have to remember to do them. Things just happen, automatically, because they've done them enough for that system to engage and make them automatic.

That system...which I lack.

Every single time I have brushed my teeth, it's been an active choice. I've had to devote thought and attention to it. It's not a routine, it's not a habit, it's something that I know is good to do, and hopefully I can remember to do it.

Every single time I exercise, or floss, or pay my rent, or drink water, or say "bless you" when someone sneezes,

It's because I've had to actively and consciously engage the protocol.

It never gets easier.

Just more familiar.

It's part of my struggle with my weight--exercise never becomes a habit, and every single time I do it, it is exactly as hard as the first time. It takes exactly as much willpower & thought.

I got lied to about how it would just "turn into a habit". And blamed, when it didn't.

Drinking water isn't a habit. Feeding myself isn't a habit. Bathing isn't a habit.

I spend so much more energy, so much more time, so much more labor on just managing to maintain my fucking meat suit.

And now you want me to ALSO do taxes?

ON TIME?

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[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

this is not automatic, all my toothbrush stuff is set up as a visual cue any time I'm near the sink

I can't even do that. If I leave my toothbrush in the same place, it becomes part of the background and I don't really notice it.

Brains are weird.

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

LOL! If I don't put my toothbrush in exactly the same place every time I'll forget where it is. I always imagined that regular folks just remember the entire bathroom sink region as "where it is" but that's far too ambiguous for my brain.

If my wife cleans the bathroom and relocates my cool custom 3D printed toothbrush holder it always throws me off...

"OK it's not where I left it. Let's start the search..."

"Oh! It's right there... It was within my vision this entire time. Moving it back to the other side of the sink now..."