Not The Onion

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Astronomers Found Something Cold and Wet Near Uranus (gizmodo.com)

submitted 1 month ago by return2ozma to c/nottheonion

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Let me help every woman you'll sleep with going forward, then. Don't just jizz on the bed when you pull out. It also gets cold, but now it's where you need to sleep. Lol.

Also don't get it in their hair, it's a bitch to get out if it dries. Invest in a daily glass of pineapple juice, though, and you probably won't have to worry about it where to end. They won't mind swallowing so much

[–] GladiusB 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Lmao. I'm an old man with a kid and a committed GF. We always have something to take care of it. But thanks for the PSA.