Kickass Women

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Addressing some of the issues this community has (self.kickasswomen)

submitted 4 weeks ago by KickassWomen to c/kickasswomen

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I want to address two issues facing this community.

Firstly, I need to get better at communicating with all of you regarding the state of this community. I have a bad habit of going for long periods of time without communicating and I need to improve on this.

Lastly, I'm sure that those of you who follow this community have realized that I delete certain posts after making them. This is because I have a personal unsaid rule: if a post only gets around 5 upvotes or less after 2-3 hours OR if I think that a post will not get a respectable amount of upvotes, I'll delete it out of respect to the person whose content was posted. Unfortunately, I think that doing this has created a sense of mistrust—why would anyone upvote any post if there's a good chance that it will get deleted? I don't know how to resolve this issue and I would appreciate any input you may have.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago) (1 children)

If a post gets ONE upvote, that means someone liked seeing it, and that it was therefore worth posting.

Scratch that, if someone posted it, that's already one person who thought it was neat enough to share.

Who cares whether you get one upvote, or a hundred? How is "only" a few upvotes not respectable?

Unless it got drowned in downvotes, things turned out net-positive.

I'd be more inclined to consider the way you delete "unsuccessful" posts disrespectful. "Mercy-killing" posts that aren't up to snuff is kinda fucked up.

How is "unless a minimum threshold of people actively approve, you don't get to be here" a respectful way of doing things?

[–] KickassWomen -4 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

If a post gets ONE upvote, that means someone liked seeing it, and that it was therefore worth posting.

Ideally, I agree with you; however, humans are emotional beings and getting a low number of upvotes can hurt people's feelings.

Who cares whether you get one upvote, or a hundred? How is “only” a few upvotes not respectable? ...“Mercy-killing” posts that aren’t up to snuff is kinda fucked up.How is “unless a minimum threshold of people actively approve, you don’t get to be here” a respectful way of doing things?

Some women get offended if their posts don't get a respectable amount of upvotes (it makes them feel like they're not beautiful or attractive imho) and then they stop communicating with me so to prevent that from happening, I delete the low-upvote posts.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago) (1 children)

I get your logic.

I think it's wrong.

I think that in an attempt to spare some feelings, you're doing something which can hurt them even worse.

[–] KickassWomen 1 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

I think that in an attempt to spare some feelings, you’re doing something which can hurt them even worse.

Out of curiosity, how so?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

I thought I was fairly clear?

Think about it. How would you feel if you knew posts featuring you kept being removed because they weren't "popular enough".

You say it's becase you don't want the relevant person to suffer feelings of inadequcy, but if I knew what you were doing, YOU would be the one making me feel that the most.

If my post got removed because it "only" got five upvotes, I'd have a hard time not taking that personally. And I'd feel talked down to and patronized if you told me you did it because you'd wanted to "spare my feelings".

[–] KickassWomen 1 points 3 weeks ago

I thought I was fairly clear?

I saw your response in my inbox and forgot about your previous replies. My bad.

I understand what you're saying and I need to think things over.