this post was submitted on 16 Sep 2024
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Everything is possessive. My wife, my husband, my girlfriend, my boyfriend, my significant other, etc. "Someone to call my own" isn't really strange; it's not super common, but definitely not that uncommon, either.
I'm 40 years old. This was pretty common to hear when I was a kid. But as the younger generations grow up, the language changes, along with the public mindset. Possessive phrases like this used to be considered romantic because it meant you were desired by someone. In today's culture, it's creepy because it sounds more like someone sees you as a thing to own.
It's actually been a long time since I heard someone use this particular phrase.
I've always understood it as going both ways. Someone you call your own, they also get to have you as their own. I'm all yours, and you're all mine. I've viewed it as a way of expressing desire and commitment.
Exactly. We're in a monogamous relationship and have made legal and spiritual contracts to be faithful with eachother, so it's fair for my SO and I to "own" each other in a sense. That doesn't mean we get to tell each other what to do, it just means we have an expectation that they won't go looking for an outside relationship.
It's like saying "my gym," I have a contract that states I can use their facilities. I don't own that gym, but I do have a certain level of expectations.