Not The Onion

12263 readers

1298 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

Links to news stories from...
...credible sources, with...
...their original headlines, that...
...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

kescusay

269

Elon Musk Says He Survived On $1 Per Day Before Becoming The Richest Man In the World – 'In America It's Pretty Easy To Keep Yourself Alive' (finance.yahoo.com)

submitted 2 months ago by return2ozma to c/nottheonion

72 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] gedaliyah 54 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Rent: 22¢ (couch split w/ 44 friends)

Breakfast: 11¢ (2 eggs)
.......... 1¢ (electricity borrowed from neighbor)
.......... Free (skillet found in street)

Gym membership: Free (lifting rocks)

Commute: 4¢ (walking in two used Kleenex boxes for shoes)

Lunch: 30¢ (cup filled with ketchup from Wendy's pump)

Commute home: 20¢ (walk on hands, use bandaid for blisters)

Clothes: 16¢ (Scotch tape for holding together discarded pizza boxes)

Yeah, that checks out.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago

Do you think the staff at the Wendy's get annoyed at having to see that poor bastard pump a full cup of ketchup every day.

Like oh jeez, I hope you filled that thing today. I cannot take a half hour of the slurping noise as Johnny makes the most of his 30¢