this post was submitted on 12 Jul 2023
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ADHD

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Hi all.

I'll try and be succinct but as I'm sure you all realize that's often easier said than done.

I don't feel like I ever hear my fellow ADHDers discuss how negative an experience hyperfocusing can be.

First off, I never feel like I'm 'enjoying' myself when I hyperfocus. It feels a lot like I'm dreaming. Time moves weirdly, all my senses go askew, and it never feels like I'm in-control.

Then when the focus fades for whatever reason, I feel exhausted. I usually have a headache from the hours of intent concentration. Oftentimes I haven't eaten, had a drink or used the toilet. As I start to come out of it I often feel quite confused and borderline hungover.

It gives me such an existential crisis. An activity is either so boring I can't summon myself to engage with it or it's so absolutely engrossing that it feels like the activity is partaking of me rather than the reverse.

And when I come out of it, to an extent I do feel as if I've been consumed. I don't feel happy or satisfied or fulfilled. I feel tired, confused and uncomfortable.

Can anyone relate? Does anyone have any advice?

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

My psychologist explained that it is hard to feel happy, satisfied, or fullfilled if you're exhausted. Happiness required energy.
Students who have just finished a long exam are a great example. They've just spent hours focusing as hard as they can, and they're all exhausted. Not many would describe themselves as happy immediately after.

Hyper focusing can use a lot of energy even though you're not aware of it. When you finally stop, you become aware of just how little energy you have left.

My psychologist recommended mindfulness. Recognise when you're exhausted, be aware of the causes (lack of rest, food, water...), and accept that it will take time for you to start feeling better again.

Understanding what's happening can make the symptoms more bearable.