this post was submitted on 02 Aug 2024
932 points (98.6% liked)

Microblog Memes

5730 readers
5415 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] expatriado 56 points 3 months ago (5 children)

you can do similar with a mayonnaise container and yogurt

[–] SpaceNoodle 83 points 3 months ago (5 children)

I fill yogurt cups with mayonnaise so I can eat mayonnaise in the office without people giving me the side-eye

[–] slaacaa 18 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica potestas. Omnis incursio infernalis adversii omnis congregatio et secta diabolica. Ergo, draco maledicte, ecclesiam tuam securi tibi facias libertate servire. Te rogamus. Audi nos.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

Roughly translated:

We exorcise you, every unclean spirit, every satanic power. Every infernal invasion of adversity, every diabolical assembly and sect. Therefore, curse the dragon, make your church safe to serve you in freedom. We ask you. Listen to us.

[–] SpaceNoodle 3 points 3 months ago

Nice try, Bobby

[–] ExplosiveLynx 1 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I'm too lazy to translate this

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

Translation added, roughly done. Tip: modern Android devices let you press and hold the switcher, which takes a screen shot of whatever is on screen. Then, you can press the translate button that appears to translate whatever is on screen. Works with the camera too - easier than firing up Google lens or whatever.

Of course, you need all the Google gubbins to do it, but if you've got that it's really powerful.

[–] jqubed 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] grue 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Is it bad that I would unironically eat that if they added ranch seasoning?

[–] jaybone 2 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

Same, with soy sauce in a diet coke bottle.

[–] jaybone 7 points 3 months ago

Directed by M Night Hellman

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

The trick is to keep an eye contact at all times while eating the mayonnaise

[–] SpaceNoodle 1 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It was a joke, I never go to the office any more

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

It was that bad? Wow, you have some serious mayo haters there

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago (1 children)

My father used to open cat food tins from the bottom clean the cat food out after it had been used and then fill the rest with chocolate mousse and reseal the bottom of the can. Then open the top of the cat food can, stick in his spoon and start to eat it.

He did this 20 odd years ago and is still famous for it all these years later.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Wow. Your father is legit a legend. I'm going to try this in his honor, maybe do a routine where I force them to pick which one I open, then eat...?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (2 children)

The better office prank is to fill condoms with yogurt for DIY gogurt.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

Jeez that's unhinged.... I love it!

[–] jelloeater85 6 points 3 months ago

Oh god.... 😳🫨😰

[–] Voyajer 11 points 3 months ago

Windex and gatorade, squirt it into your mouth.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] jelloeater85 4 points 3 months ago

I can hear my arteries clogging. ☠️

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Thanks Google Gemini...