this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2024
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In not actually diagnosed with anything, just identify with a lot of ADHD stuff. I never tried to get a diagnosis because I think others have it way worse than me.
My life is like a pinball machine that I've carefully designed over the years. It lets me be pushed around by processes, reminders, and honestly a great deal of patience from friends and colleagues. It helps that I'm good enough at my job, I guess. But I'm so lucky that a) my studies were paid by the government, b) my main interest growing up was computers, c) found a chill company without terrible management that is very neurodivergent friendly.
But I've been hella depressed since my dishwasher broke down because that threw a wrench in my processes at home. I won't do the dishes for days, and because of that, somehow I also don't do the laundry? Or vacuum the floor? I swear I had a system and I was really tidy. And all I have to do is call the dishwasher mechanic 2 months ago.
Bro I know the feeling. I’m still in uni, but I’ll have my life put together, getting homework done on time, cleaning regularly etc. and then there’ll be like something wrong with one of my grades and I procrastinate writing the email to my professor for no reason at all and suddenly I can’t do anything and I get overwhelmed by everything I’m not doing and that just makes me dread doing anything.
Anyway, sorry you’re feeling depressed right now. But if you want my opinion, if it’s impacting your life negatively, I don’t think it matters if someone has it worse than you. If your life could be better, that’s what matters.
Honestly, finding a psychiatrist and setting up the appointment was probably the hardest part of getting medicated. I put it off for multiple years even though I knew that I probably had ADHD, but let me tell you, that first day on my meds, sitting in class and realizing I am actually getting information out of the lecture, it was so weird. Like wow people actually learn things in class? I can actually write emails and make phone calls without having to build up the motivation over several days? I regret not doing it sooner.
Anyway, if you feel like medication would help, once you get your “pinball machine” running again, I think getting diagnosed may be worth a try. You deserve to try and make your life better just as much as others do, even if you don’t have it as bad as they do.
Thanks buddy :) I even already have the contact of a place where it's easy to get tested with no long wait. Just need to take the jump