this post was submitted on 11 Jul 2023
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ADHD
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I sometimes wonder if this simply comes from a lifetime of being late, missing appointments and generally expecting oneself to forget something important.
I also hate being scared to do something because I might forget time and miss the important appointment. Usually it is possible to set a timer. But sometimes it feels dumb to set a timer for 10 minutes but then I hate waiting. Luckily for me it all is still on the scale of annoying rather than hindering my life in any major way. But still a lot of time goes into just being early and not doing shit because other shit is up later.
Honestly I think you might be right
Since I've started my meds and some behavior changes along with them I have only been late 3 times, all traffic related. And I still managed to get stuff done those days.
Those first few weeks though were pretty damn stressful as I was suddenly finding I could manage my time.
Before getting diagnosed, the running joke was that I'd be late for my own funeral. I even joked with my family that in the event I did pass to have whoever brought my ashes to the BBQ to show up fashionably late in my honor as one last joke.
Yes I've also gained that reputation..
I really try to be on time, I just get distracted
Yeah 'waiting mode'.. Ruins all my productivity
Maybe. Probably varies from person to person, as one would expect. Excessive anxiety is a real problem for some though, with, AFAIU, plenty of actual diagnoses going around for such symptoms.
In my own case, as a recently loosely tentatively self-diagnosed ND, anxiety was one of the obvious problems and give-aways. If there's some possibility of something not being "correct", a pile of obsessiveness and anxiety around that issue immediately ensues, not just around whether it will occur correctly, but also around what I can or have to do to make sure it will be done correctly. Whether it's punctuality or cleaning something or learning something. Sometimes I get anxious about whether I can actually remember anything and actually try to just sit there and remember everything I know, which obviously doesn't work (our brains don't work that way) and causes me anxiety.
something not being "correct"
make sure it will be done correctly
Dude you hit the nail.
I definitely get this.
On reflection, there was definitely. Anxiety about somehow arriving in a situation I didn't like or was outside of my control. But no actual reality about that at all
Yea ... the control side of it is a big factor too I think.
And for me, it's not like I can't "go with the flow" at all ... it's just that can only happen in the right situation where all/any circumstances are going to be ok or there aren't external requirements like being functional for work the next day or whatever that have to be done correctly.