this post was submitted on 11 Jul 2023
49 points (94.5% liked)

ADHD

9558 readers
251 users here now

A casual community for people with ADHD

Values:

Acceptance, Openness, Understanding, Equality, Reciprocity.

Rules:

Encouraged:

Relevant Lemmy communities:

Autism

ADHD Memes

Bipolar Disorder

Therapy

Mental Health

Neurodivergent Life Hacks

lemmy.world/c/adhd will happily promote other ND communities as long as said communities demonstrate that they share our values.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

I'm an hour early for the bus and trying to decide on what to eat so I can past the 2 hours until I get to the eating point. Can't decide what to eat. Too anxious. Dumplings, I'll eat dumplings. Something about using chopsticks I really enjoy.

Bus leaves in 30 minutes, the stop is 5 minutes walk away. I have my dumplings. Still so anxious. I arrive at the bus stop and eat my dumplings. Its now 15 minutes til the bus leaves, I'm exactly on time.

Finally some relief when I'm sitting in the bus checked in and ready to go.

I'm going on holiday to ride mountain bikes for 5 days. I should be excited.

Anyone else gets this?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] RQG 23 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I sometimes wonder if this simply comes from a lifetime of being late, missing appointments and generally expecting oneself to forget something important.

I also hate being scared to do something because I might forget time and miss the important appointment. Usually it is possible to set a timer. But sometimes it feels dumb to set a timer for 10 minutes but then I hate waiting. Luckily for me it all is still on the scale of annoying rather than hindering my life in any major way. But still a lot of time goes into just being early and not doing shit because other shit is up later.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Honestly I think you might be right

Since I've started my meds and some behavior changes along with them I have only been late 3 times, all traffic related. And I still managed to get stuff done those days.

Those first few weeks though were pretty damn stressful as I was suddenly finding I could manage my time.

Before getting diagnosed, the running joke was that I'd be late for my own funeral. I even joked with my family that in the event I did pass to have whoever brought my ashes to the BBQ to show up fashionably late in my honor as one last joke.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Yes I've also gained that reputation..

I really try to be on time, I just get distracted

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Yeah 'waiting mode'.. Ruins all my productivity

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Maybe. Probably varies from person to person, as one would expect. Excessive anxiety is a real problem for some though, with, AFAIU, plenty of actual diagnoses going around for such symptoms.

In my own case, as a recently loosely tentatively self-diagnosed ND, anxiety was one of the obvious problems and give-aways. If there's some possibility of something not being "correct", a pile of obsessiveness and anxiety around that issue immediately ensues, not just around whether it will occur correctly, but also around what I can or have to do to make sure it will be done correctly. Whether it's punctuality or cleaning something or learning something. Sometimes I get anxious about whether I can actually remember anything and actually try to just sit there and remember everything I know, which obviously doesn't work (our brains don't work that way) and causes me anxiety.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

something not being "correct"

make sure it will be done correctly

Dude you hit the nail.

I definitely get this.

On reflection, there was definitely. Anxiety about somehow arriving in a situation I didn't like or was outside of my control. But no actual reality about that at all

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Yea ... the control side of it is a big factor too I think.

And for me, it's not like I can't "go with the flow" at all ... it's just that can only happen in the right situation where all/any circumstances are going to be ok or there aren't external requirements like being functional for work the next day or whatever that have to be done correctly.