Gardening

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What to do with an acre of grass (lemm.ee)

submitted 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) by [email protected] to c/gardening

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I don’t want this much ornamental grass, what do I do? Let nature take over a patch of it? Hire a landscape designer for a minimum of 10k? Please send help.

More info: I’ve stopped using -icides and I have a robot mower at 3.5”.

I have let a patch grow wild and added a couple apple trees and wildflowers. The city code enforcers want to mow it and fine me, but I don’t plan on letting them.

I’m kinda against fences because they feel pretty anti-social and I’m already only allowed to see people if I use a car. Then again, fences seem like the only way to combat these crazy deer.

I don’t want to design it myself because I want to believe that professional landscape designers do more than just plop stuff around on a whim.

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[–] Death_Equity 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Raised beds for planting food, which surely will be cheaper than buying food. Right?

Why can't you design the landscape? Corner blobs flowing into side blobs and then a smokeless fire pit on a brick or paver patio in the middle or a corner, pergola over top of you want. Slap a tree in the middle of the fattest parts of the blobs, bushes around those, and then link between those with flowers, then you put ornamental grasses where blobs meet, and finally a bunch of small flowers that you will have to buy every fucking year just so your bitch of an ex-wife and her retail manager boyfriend can enjoy the backyard that you put in blood, sweat, and tears to afford.

Could always get a chicken coop. Chickens are fun, they poop food and fertilizer that is great for nitrogen heavy greens and vegetables. I'd probably do chickens and a food garden. You wouldn't really be able to do anything until next year, so you have time to save and do research. Start small though, having a half acre of crops can be a bit much to go all in on your first year.

How about a butterfly garden? That is low maintenance and the cost is fairly reasonable if you can't find a local org that helps supply the seeds.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

If she's an ex-wife, why does she get to enjoy your yard?

[–] Death_Equity 2 points 5 months ago

Get a prenup.