this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2023
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In the last year or so I started to see so many people of my age that have done truly incredible things and still doing more.
For the vast majority of my life my only goals were gettimg academic satisfaction and doing unproductive stuff in the free time to get temporary pleasure. No end goal whatsoever.
I kind of don't know what I've been doing in the last 17 years while someone gets a patent on solar systems, other invents a new recyclable plastic, and another found a successful startup. I mean, they all find what they're supposed to be doing with their lives and excel in them.
I feel overwhelmed for trying to pace up with these kind of people. Yet I don't like the way the things are and I can't do anything but envy those people.
Anyone with experience in this regard? How did you deal with this? Did you eventually "pace up" with these people or was it too late or an unattainable goal?
Edit: Whoops, I didn't expect so many replies! Thanks, I'll look into them all

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[–] andy_wijaya_med 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

How old are you OP? Being "normal" isn't time wasting. You grew up, you went to school, will find a job, find love, maybe build your own family (or not). It's beautiful. You don't have to achieve greatness in life. Be yourself, be kind to others and that's actually enough. If you find something you're passionate about, and you can dedicate yourself for it and in time be good at it, it's good! If you have an unremarkable career, it's also good! The obsession with "success" is not a good thing, in my opinion. Be happy, and be the source of happiness for other people. The time you enjoy wasting is not a time wasted!

[–] required 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

I hinted in the post I was 17
What I achieved doesn't satisfy me (nor my actions), and I want to change that

[–] IMongoose 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You're 17 and your peers are doing that shit? I thought you were 17 years out of highschool, in your 30s. If you are still in high school and want to do something join some kind of competitive club or something. Explore different hobbies or experiences. To expect a 17 year old to have achieved those things you listed is absurd. It's great that you are thinking of your future now but don't stress out so much about it.

[–] required 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Nobody expects anything of that sort from me. I want it myself. I see people from similar backgrounds who has went through a different path than I chose (which was, usually, not based on reason or thought) and achieve great things. I just don't want to miss more opportunities anymore and it's incredibly hard to make sure you're on the right path.
I'm trying to do some stuff and have been semi-successful. But it's not the same as people starting earlier

[–] IMongoose 1 points 1 year ago

But it's not the same as people starting earlier

Ya, my main point is that at 17 it would be hard for you to start something earlier. You would've had to have a lot of guidence and support basically since birth to achieve something particularly noteworthy while under 20. 17 is not too late. 17 is not even starting for 99% of people. You want to take initiative, so maybe make a 5 year plan with realistic and honest goals. Really think about where you want to be and why you want to be there. But seriously, don't sweat it so much.

[–] andy_wijaya_med 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Your life hasn't even started yet. Just enjoy your life, your journey. Once you are old enough, you gonna miss this time. It's one of the best time of your life. Playing with friends, meeting new people, exploring new things, finding hobbies. When I was 17 I was thinking only about girls. I didn't have much responsibility outside of my study, and the biggest decision I've made at that time was choosing which major/ subjects I wanted to study in university. I achieved nothing when I was 17. Now I'm 35 years old, have a wife, a small house which has become our home, a small family with a daughter and a small dog, and am an attending neurosurgeon. I speak 4 languages fluently, can play music instruments (piano, guitar), sing as a hobby. I am satisfied with where I am, and the most important of all, I'm happy. :)

Just take your time. The fact that you're thinking about your future means you are already one step ahead of most people your age. Keep doing what you think is right.

[–] required 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Your life hasn’t even started yet. Just enjoy your life, your journey. Once you are old enough, you gonna miss this time.

I'm really sure of that. I'm realizing how much youth affects people's life later on directly or indirectly and it just makes me more anxious about my decisions. I'm definitely doing many mistakes that my 30 year old will remember with grief.
If I look at my past I kind of did the worst decisions I could. And I could perfectly avoid bad decisions. I just didn't, in combination of several factors and my ignorance.

[–] andy_wijaya_med 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

It's time for you to make mistakes and you'd learn from them. Don't worry too much. Trust me. :D I also did many mistakes, and if I hadn't done the mistakes I wouldn't be here today. In hindsight, there was a specific mistake I did, which have caused me pursuing career in neurosurgery. No joke. :)