this post was submitted on 19 May 2024
612 points (97.2% liked)
tumblr
3452 readers
565 users here now
Welcome to /c/tumblr, a place for all your tumblr screenshots and news.
Our Rules:
-
Keep it civil. We're all people here. Be respectful to one another.
-
No sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia or any other flavor of bigotry. I should not need to explain this one.
-
Must be tumblr related. This one is kind of a given.
-
Try not to repost anything posted within the past month. Beyond that, go for it. Not everyone is on every site all the time.
-
No unnecessary negativity. Just because you don't like a thing doesn't mean that you need to spend the entire comment section complaining about said thing. Just downvote and move on.
Sister Communities:
-
/c/[email protected] - Star Trek chat, memes and shitposts
-
/c/[email protected] - General memes
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
"Cave Johnson here. I have bad news, and I have good news. The bad news is that the AI we developed for our melee sentry turret concept developed a targeting error due to misinterpreting the verbal input 'aim for center mass'. We think it misheard the last word. It only ever delivered nonfatal injuries to the test subjects rectal regions.
The good news is that one of our interns replaced the knife with a dildo and stationed one in his supervisor's office along with a scathing resignation letter. The supervisor reported faster and more intense prostatic stimulation than any sex toy currently on the market - apparently this guy's a connoisseur! HA!
The turrets have all been refitted with different sizes and shapes of dildos, and tight little studded leather vests. Testing will resume tomorrow morning: we're rebranding and exploring its potential for the sex toy industry.
Also find that intern, we need to get him back as a paid employee - that type of innovative thinking shouldn't go to waste!"