It's been rough since 6/30. I can barely browse and leave comments in my .world account. I'm sticking to .ml for now.
pinwurm
joined 1 year ago
it always makes me miserable to see her happy with someone else
Well, frankly - you can’t handle a friendship with her. Friends are supposed to support each other’s successes and you don’t have the capacity to be genuine about it right now.
It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person or weak or whatever. It’s human nature. It’s part of the risk we take when we have the capacity to love. Even when we want a friendship and understand that value, there remains an unskippable hurdle.
Go to the festival, but you should tell her honestly that you’re not ready to be friends - and it has nothing to do with her. And ask her to respect your boundaries in the interim.
Maybe in a few months or a year, you’ll be a better place to reconnect. Maybe by the time you’re ready, you’ll find your circle of friends to be more fulfilling and you don’t need her.
Time and space. You otherwise can’t heal if you’re constantly having sounds reopened.
it always makes me miserable to see her happy with someone else
Well, frankly - you can’t handle a friendship with her. Friends are supposed to support each other’s successes and you don’t have the capacity to be genuine about it right now.
It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person or weak or whatever. It’s human nature. It’s part of the risk we take when we have the capacity to love. Even when we want a friendship and understand that value, there remains an unskippable hurdle.
Go to the festival, but you should tell her honestly that you’re not ready to be friends - and it has nothing to do with her. And ask her to respect your boundaries in the interim.
Maybe in a few months or a year, you’ll be a better place to reconnect. Maybe by the time you’re ready, you’ll find your circle of friends to be more fulfilling and you don’t need her.
Time and space. You otherwise can’t heal if you’re constantly having sounds reopened.
Here is a list of Apps coming to Lemmy:
https://kbin.social/m/kbinMeta/t/71764
Plenty for iOS to chose from, Christian’s legacy continues. Memmy and Mlem both feel pretty close to Apollo - and are both directly inspired by it.
These apps are in early beta. They have constant updates (daily for Memmy and weekly for Mlem), so you can kind of see them being built in real time. If you’re patient with the developers, you’ll get that Apollo experience very soon. It’s like 80% of the way there.
Liftoff is pretty cool too, though it’s a different design approach.
(I’m using Memmy now, actually.)
Lemmy is Reddit.
Mastadon is Twitter.
Kbin is a bit of both.
They federate. So imagine using your Reddit account to reply to a tweet. And vice versa.
They don’t share the same servers - they just communicate with each other. Kind of like how I can use Gmail to write to a friend that uses a Yahoo Mail.
Makes more sense for Meta to create their own "Metaverse" than join an open-source network.
Instagram and Facebook already communicate, it won't be too difficult to include WhatsApp into that mix.
If they buy something like Mastodon, it would make better business sense to cut it off from the Federation and sync it with Meta's products instead.
Which app?
They are two different apps with different developers/contributors and different visions.
There's huge difference in where each are in their current stage of development, but keep in mind both of the apps will look & act completely different in a few weeks.
Mlem's beta test has met it's 10K user limit, but there's still room Memmy. Give it a try. Join the Discord after and talk to the developers/contributors about what you think - they're very responsive.
They’re both forums that look and act similar to Reddit.
Fundamentally - they look different, are coded differently and have some jargon differences.
For example, the communities in Kbin are called “magazines”. A lot of folks still say “sub” as a holdover.
Yet, they’re both part of the Federation, so you can up/down vote, comment and subscribe to each other’s stuff from your home.
Federation is similar to having a group text with friends. It doesn’t matter if you have an iPhone and they have an android. It doesn’t matter if you’re on Verizon and they’re on ATT. The software is designed to communicate with each other.
Lemmy differs from Kbin in that it can be franchised into an independently owned and operated instances. So there’s multiple Lemmys like Lemmy.ml and Lemmy.world. Each instance can set its own rules and even chose which other instances/platforms it can federate without. More importantly, nobody owns all of it.
Commenting from the Memmy App beta for iOS.
Still early days, but it’s doing the basics quite well. They and Mlem are hoping for a 6/30 App Store release, so interesting times ahead.
Unironically, Ellen Pao was the best CEO Reddit's ever had.
She made a lot of difficult and fair choices for the future health of the company.
Reddit needed to be cleaned if they wanted to attract a larger audience and increase ad revenue. Heck, that was her job - and I believe banning hate subreddits was appropriate. There was expected blowback, but I suspect that'd be smoothed over in time.
The mistake was dismissing Victoria. That completely destroyed the beloved AMA format. It also coincided with the infamous Rampart disaster. 10-15 answered softball questions, and Harrelson treated it like another press junket. I mean, why wouldn't he?
There was no Reddit ambassador to explain how the format works, what makes it successful and why it's important for the success of what they're promoting.
More importantly, it validated Reddit's belief that Pao was not fit to lead Reddit, because she didn't understand it. Much of the community thought she was only brought aboard to placate accusations of sexism in the organization. It didn't help.
And still, Pao was big enough to admit when she's wrong: We screwed up. Not just on July 2, but also over the past several years. We haven’t communicated well, and we have surprised moderators and the community with big changes. We have apologized and made promises to you, the moderators and the community, over many years, but time and again, we haven’t delivered on them. When you’ve had feedback or requests, we haven’t always been responsive. The mods and the community have lost trust in me and in us, the administrators of reddit.
What do you think the odds of a narcissist like u/Spez ever holding himself the least bit accountable? If he's not fired, he won't.
But ya know what? Fine. Let him follow in Elon's footsteps and see what happens.
I met one of my closest friends on r/needafriend. Turns out, she lived like a 10 minute walk from me - and we met up over some food.
On paper, our friendship shouldn’t work. We have little in common in terms of activities and goals. But we know how to make each other laugh and ‘get’ each other’s personality. Been like 9 years.
Whether it’s Reddit, Lemmy, Discord or some other platform - there’s definitely people out there looking for the same things. Online is a good place to start.
See if your closest city has a ‘Speed Friending’ event. Here in Boston, we have “Skip the Small Talk” and you get seated with a stranger and a dialogue prompt. I found that to be really effective too.