and they are not responsible for the feelings of OP. Why should they have to accept OPs way of being blunt when OP won't do the same for them? Being autistic isn't an excuse for being a jerk.
OP talks about feeling like they have to coddle people, and I guarantee they 100% feel the same when talking to OP.
I’m just trying to communicate in a way that works for me
Here's the kicker, you have to communicate in a way that works for people other than yourself when you aren't talking to only yourself. Everyone would like to be blunt all the time, but then we'd argue more and constantly be at each other's throats.
OP should read about diplomacy, especially between countries without similar languages.
Yes, this is life. We all feel like this almost all the time.