fulcrummed

Sleeping on the couch with a fur blanket is always a viable option.

That would have made a lot more sense.

I have always intended to lookup the difference between supersonic and hypersonic. I knew ss meant > speed of sound, I learned hypersonic means >= 5x speed of sound. If that thing can fly 1500 km, it can do it in ~17min. That’s like Hamburg to Kyiv in the time it takes to make an Aldi Margarita pizza in the oven(with extra tomatoes, cheese, basil, and garlic salt)… or get one delivered to Hamburg from Kyiv via hypersonic missile.

Despondent, we collect here,

No fight left in our souls,

We heal through immolation,

Our torture ends in coals.

If that Gif you responded with in the other comment was from this episode it’s the one where Homer is desperate to be an inventor just like “THOMAS EDISON”! (Who was also a relentless self promoter) it’s been a decade at least since I’ve seen this so go easy on the recollection:

Homer invents the makeup shotgun and tries it on Marge who says she thinks he’s “got that thing set to [Harlequin]”

He also invents the electric hammer and it destroys everything in its path dragging him along for the ride - a second total disaster.

Then Homer nearly eats it falling backward as he leans in his chair at the dinner table. He doesn’t fall as he had added a hinged leg at the back of his chair to tilt out and make contact with the floor to stop him from falling. Marge and the family are actually really impressed with this idea and compliment Homer on it. Proud of himself, the family set off to see the Edison exhibit or whatever it is. As they’re going through Homer sees that Edison’s chair had the same 5th leg. Completely dejected that his one great idea had already been done - by Edison no less. I can’t quite remember how it plays out - I think Homer breaks in and wants to remove the leg from Edison’s chair so he can take credit for the idea” he uses the electric hammer which kinda destroys the whole exhibit. Homer makes his escape and I seem to remember a news cast the next day reporting on the vandalism. The button on the whole saga was that “in happy news” the event had led to the crediting of Edison with two previously undiscovered inventions - the 5th leg anti-tip safety chair, and the electric hammer.

I’m just amazed that for once dad’s butt prevented the release of toxic gas.

It can’t get away fast enough!

They said monorail… but is it not the treehouse of horrors where Bart is feeling unimportant and gains the ability to read people’s thoughts ( I wanna say money paw) and can use his mind to turn them into wonky things? He turns Homer into a Jack in the box.

I remember a radio/tv announcer seeing something really strange happen during a baseball game or something - like the pitcher suddenly gets duck feet - announcer says like “and what do we say whenever something strange happens… it’s good Bart did that”

The whole town becomes terrified of him.

The dude abides. Good call!

3/5?? That’s Lenny not Carl. And racism has no place in these walls!

Reminds me of this old one that did the rounds:

I think a better punchline is “None. The lightbulb has to change itself”