fairchild

Was about to say the same, definitely a good choice!

Same here!

Bandcamp. You always have the opportunity to pay as much as you wish as long as the minimum amount is covered, some even offer free Downloads. It might be a question of time however how long Bandcamp will stay this way as it was bought a while back. It's also a good place to get releases that you might not be able to find locally, for instance some lables in other regions.

It might be difficult to find some smaller Bands however, as it takes a while and a bit of sucess until Bands make the jump from just playing live to uploading Music to Streaming Services. I'd recommend looking for Labels first and dig through other people's collections on Bandcamp.

I guess in Metal circles attending Concerts and Festivals are still very much the way to go, as many people still appreciate not only Live events but also buying Vinyls or Merch even to support Bands or as Memorabilia. Many Festivals focus on the local Music scene, you can often support them by buying Merch as well, and they are great for networking as (at least in Europe) many organization teams are in contact with each other. You should also keep your eyes open for Vinyl stores, it's a great way to get in contact with other metalheads or discovering new Music.

I hope that helps :)

Edit: You probably know most of what I said anyway so I hope it doesnt come across in a weird way, I just wanted to express my take on it. Maybe consider getting a high-quality Record player if you feel like going down that road :)

Keychron site is a pain (to use).

Someone sent me this link as I was looking for a keyboard, so I'll pass it on. Set region to where you live and select keboard, then go through the vendors listed and see if you can buy the Keychron you like from there.

yeah, that peace and tranquility. embraced by moss.

Reminds me a bit of a film scene in The Pointsman from 1986

Sort of weird, but that sounds like a really great place to be, doesn't it!?

Maybe some of the situations you experienced are what causes stress/anxiety in a similar way, which makes it harder to talk. You might find answers to it once you dig deeper into that topic. The only advice I can give you in all of this is to take your time with it, or better put: give yourself the time you need, it's the most important part... I'm often super slow with understanding where things come from, how they affect me and so on. I think it's a good sign you came here to ask, a first step in the right direction, so to speak.

I've been occupying my mind with plants a lot a few years ago and found geometry in all the leaves and blossoms particularily interesting. Also, botanical names is a whole topic by itself. The pronounciation or words in general surprisingly often fit the "character" of the plants pretty well :)

Sure, np. It always helps me to read other people's experiences as well so I thought I'll share that as it's no issue for me to talk about it. Try to get into that topic with your therapist, maybe you will need some time or a few attempts, but I'm really wishing you the best with it!

Feeling overwhelmed is a secondary reaction to it that developed over time. Let's put it that way, there's been people that have not been as sensitive as my therapist an I've been in a few situations where people forced me to answer when I couldn't + forced eye contact etc., which didn't make it easier trying to express what you feel/have in your mind. Getting up and leave was the only way to escape these situations. Then, I was also bullied half my life. I think you get a better picture now.

I like your username btw, fellow plant friend :)

yeah, sounds familiar. I'd also say it's completely different than other situations where I'm usually lost for words, for instance if I need to react spontaneusly, delayed processing and such.

There are some things I just can't find the right words for and/or not being able to articulate any of the words that would express what I have in my head, even though I have a conception of what to say. For me it's about expressing emotions too. So I would begin 1, 2 words starting a sentence and then... no chance finishing it.

Usually my brain starts spinning quite intensely in these situations with either memories of similar past situations and thoughts about how to express what I'm trying to say, (kinda like overstimulation in mental images/thoughts leading to me not being able to think about what to actually do) or just turning completely blank, both in my head and verbally. Eye contact, definitely no.

I gave up on it over the years with people around me and avoid these topics and situations. However, my last therapist helped me a lot in this regard, as she always gave me the time I needed to find back to being able to speak again when it happened. Sometimes I sat there completely blank for minutes, just staring outside the window or at the walls, feeling panicky and the need to just jump up and leave the room. I actually did once, but felt really bad about it after as she was such a calm person that I usually always felt safe with. After that incident, and over time I learned to try and rephrase the initial sentence or try to express something else connected to the feeling I wanted to talk about, learning how to navigate the situation. So I guess there's a possibility to make some progress.

Great tip, thanks, I tend to overlook that option. My local library does offer audiobooks indeed but as I don't reside in a english-speaking country I highly doubt it would be available.

Discord, definitely!! It might be hard to ditch but it's worth trying. I was never a big fan of it so it was kinda easy yet I still miss being able to contact some people on there. But the more people continue using it, the harder it will be to change things.

Spotify and Chromium, I agree on both as well. Try the options mentioned above concerning Spotify. And yeah, Music streaming is a hard one... I have a dedicated mobile device for Music streaming platforms of this kind if I feel the itch as well as a modded ipod for on the go. Besides that using Bandcamp on a seperate user profile on a Pixel with Graphene OS, no Google stuff installed however and it works pretty great. Highly recommend getting into a habit of buying Music (digital/physical) and listening stuff you actually own on desktop. Simple cmus or sth will do the job.

Maybe Librewolf or other Firefox fork for Browser.

Edit: typo. Edit 2: I'd keep a chromium-based Browser of some sort, you might need it sometime for something. Just use different Browsers for different things.

Oder Ribiseltopfenstangerl!