Stromatose

joined 1 year ago
[–] Stromatose 1 points 9 months ago (5 children)

I do not disagree that the two things have vastly different histories but that isn't the point of the conversation to be had. A woman's fear of interactions with any random man is her perception molded by her life experiences.

I am not a woman so of course I can not speak with my own experiences on this through my own lens but I have had many conversations with the various women in my life to atleast recognize a portion of their perspectives.

I do also concede that they have explained feeling more fearful around men than I can relate to as a man with a physically imposing stature most of my life.

I totally understand that I don't know what it's like to be a woman in a male oriented society and to be looked at like an object as they sometimes are.

HOWEVER, not one of these female friends, family, or partners had ever been sexually assaulted and of all of them, only two had ever been in physical altercations with a 1 man each.

Now before you jump on that as an "aha!" moment, consider that theae incidents occurred in their 30s.

As a generally mildly mannered person, I have also found myself in physical altercations with other men a few times in my life... More so than my female friends.

Only one incident in your whole life as evidence of violence and ready to consider all men as dangerous? Wtf?

How can you have such a low opinion of 50% of the people in your life that you think they are worse than a wild animal? It's unfounded in reality

[–] Stromatose 5 points 9 months ago (9 children)

They didn't say that at all. What they are trying to express is that stereotypes, such as "men are usually dangerous to women", or "women should fear men just in case", are disingenuous ideas that harm both sides.

Some men are good people and some are bad. Some women are good people and some are bad.

Condemning either group for the actions of a few perpetuates the stereotype by making impressionable indiviuals on both sides of the equation start accepting the "complimentary" stereotypes just because they observe a few correlations from time to time.

Before long, critical thinking goes out the window, correlation is assumed to be causation and you've got men reacting aggressively to posts that say they are dangerous and women saying "I chose the bear!" even though they know that is staticallyess safe because it aligns with the message they think they need to share because they buy into the same stereotype the men did and vice versa.

It runs parallel to the same sort of thing playing out in politics around the world though it's certainly more pronounced in the US thanks to the two party system and volume of communication.

Talking about the issue is fine but this discourse is flawed. Imagine how it would play out if the question was "white people, would you rather be stranded on a island with a black person or an alligator?"

And now your argument would be "white people should be afraid of black people until they are given a reason not to be."

Doesn't that sound really messed up to say? I hope so because it felt bad just to type out for the purpose of this comparison.

Each person is an individual unto themselves and I think if you can agree with that, then there is no rationale that can support group stereotypes in human psychology.

[–] Stromatose 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

So why not hang out with them outside of the workplace?

[–] Stromatose 2 points 11 months ago

Yep, I really enjoy my job too and I even work with some really good people but I keep my personal life... personal. It's not like I hide my personality and life from my colleagues but I've got enough friends that I don't feel like I need to add any more to my inner circle.

[–] Stromatose 0 points 11 months ago

I don't mean to say that the place can't be nice but I would hope your home is of greater comfort than your workplace in most cases.

[–] Stromatose 0 points 11 months ago

Obviously some different life circumstances influence your options of making new friends as an adult. I can certainly understand your perspective there but perhaps it's hard for me to relate since my significant other and I have no children nor do our friend and none of us desire to ever have them either.

I'm sure they consume a great deal of time and energy that probably drives a person to crave social experiences away from them. If work is the only place they can get away from them I can understand that too but hobbies can still be an option.

World feels overcrowded as it is. Getting a shit deal because so many others choose to have kids and then want to force people to spend time trapped in a box with them... It's like a whole population of people having their cake and eating it too... Or whatever expression fits best here for an unfair, double-dipping advantage...

And actually now that I think of it, two of our friend group did have kids and we all drifted apart because they were no longer able to commit time and weekends like we did to each other.

They used to often say "we should all hang out again!" and such but then either we're never available or had to leave early or host events at their place which required interacting with their kids and I gotta say toddlers are not skillful conversationalists.

I don't have a solution for people with kids trying to find friends at work. I can understand why it might seem appealing to them but speaking from the other side, it feels like a burden I shouldn't have to carry.

[–] Stromatose 8 points 11 months ago (20 children)

I'm sure you have friends outside of work right?

That's the part I never understand about people who connect working in office and with the fun of seeing others is person.

Why are you so willing to put up with commuting, office quality furniture, public restroom facilities, sick people who realllllly should have leverage optional work from home days or just regular old sick time... When you could just have more time for friends outside of the workplace.

I see my friends on weekends or they come over and we have game nights spending quality time with each other rather than infrequent unplanned interactions when we both should be doing something else.

My personal life friends are the people I "jump" for. Not coworkers. Having to "jump" for a coworker is and should be an inconvenience in the workplace because it means a failure of planning occurred somewhere. You can still have friendly camaraderie in the face of inconvenient circumstances but I don't think you need to have some deep relationship to help out a colleague. That comes with the job to some extent.

When I've become friends with people from work, I invite them into my entirely separate personal life and in fact that is the case for one of my closest friends.

I just feel like If you wanna hang out with people from the office invite them to something outside of the office. The whole captive audience thing is such a demoralizing foundation to start a friendship with.

[–] Stromatose 2 points 11 months ago

I too have ADHD and my in office days are so full of interruptions I just don't plan productive work during that time anymore and instead just book them full of pointless meetings.

Working at home I get interrupted exactly once a day by my girlfriend while she plays with our cat on her lunch break since she had a permanent work from home position even before covid.

A single quiet Thursday or Friday let's me out pace all my peers books of work. The company just wastes their money when they make me show up in person. I don't even by lunch or snacks out there or anything so it doesn't even support local economy. Just wasting time and money for people who can't keep their home organized enough to effectively work from.

[–] Stromatose 4 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

It's the kind of short sighted strategy you always see from upper level corporate execs. They make impulse decisions on limited data and justify it with predictions based on old data.

You know, the only kind of data it's possible for them to have at the time of their decision because they refuse to pay for external analysis or external data when they can use their own people and records!

So some jackass sets up a slicer on an excel file assigning an arbitrary value to the asset based on headcount capacity and woudknt you know it? The numbers go down when there are less people there.

Well that answers everything you need to know. Keep people in office, property retains value. Simple stuff really but they will say in their speeches and presentations that they have gone over the numbers and this is the way to go.

Never having considered that they could leverage the square footage in other equitable ways than they already do because, well, that data simply wasn't available.

And it's all bs anyways because real estate value is speculative and determined by the buyer. So when larger business embrace the hybrid or work from home model they give themselves a market advantage and can purchase or lease smaller office space at lower costs than they would have previously so really the only way this grift works is if all they big players keep overpaying for property.

Sooner or later it gets solved by the market whether that want it to be or not. The genie of work from home is already out of the bottle it's just a bunch of "boomer" businesses death gripping and smoking copium as much as they can until they are forced to adapt

[–] Stromatose 7 points 11 months ago

I bought it digitally on release day so my slightly-above-casual-gamer GF could play on the switch and then a few days later I pirated a copy to play on my steam deck and pc interchangeably. While I would have no major qualms about buying additional copies, Nintendo's insistence on maintaining their native control scheme in a western market will guarantee that many core gamers like myself, who are familiarized with Microsoft and Sony control schemes, will shy away from their products.

I can only have my immersion and fun interrupted by canceling out of a menu or action so many times before I'm just not that interested anymore despite having given it an honest try more than once.

Whine all they want about piracy but I doubt they aren't losing a significant number of legitimate sales from it. Most people who buy Nintendo consoles and games are loyal to that ecosystem from my own experiences and wouldn't bother with learning how to access pirated materials.

So yeah I also pirated it and would pirate another game from them too if I felt like giving it a shot but even if pirating wasn't an option, I would never buy a Nintendo product for myself.

view more: ‹ prev next ›