this post was submitted on 26 Dec 2023

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Stop Drinking

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This is a place to motivate each other to control or stop drinking. It is also a place for non drinkers to discuss and share.

We welcome anyone who wishes to join in by asking for advice, sharing our experiences and stories, or just encouraging someone who is trying to quit or cut down.

Please post only when sober; you’re welcome to read in the meanwhile.

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2764 days since my last drink… (self.stopdrinking)

submitted 11 months ago by AteshgaRubyTeeth to c/stopdrinking

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… and I wonder why I’m no longer drinking.

I stopped because I only wanted more after my first. This was a problem as me and my friends were doing this every every in the weekend.

Stopping with drinking was a huge relief as I no longer suffered from crippling hangovers.

This is now years ago and my life, and the people around me, has changed. Everyone calmed down with the drinks and is no longer going on benders. People now drink casually as “normal” people do.

I wonder if I could do it because I do miss the taste of the drinks and slight buzz. On the other hand I feel blessed to have discovered this secret power of a life without alcohol and hangovers.

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[–] Betch 13 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Yeah that sounds a lot like me when I'm about to start using again, whatever the substance. Don't do it.

If you're the kind of person that can't have just one, you might be playing with fire. Your friends might be drinking "as normal people do" but what says you will? You might end up being the only one wasted when everybody else is just having a few drinks and you'll not only be suffering from crippling hangovers but also crippling hangxiety.

You quit for a reason and it's easy to forget after a while but if you've had a problem with alcohol in the past, you probably still do and it's a very slippery slope. You will be reminded very quickly why it is you stopped and you'll have to start over from day 1.

Maybe your problem with alcohol wasn't that severe but why would you be posting on a sober community if it wasn't? Why would you bother remembering how many days it has been since your last drink?

[–] AteshgaRubyTeeth 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Thanks man, hit the nail on the head.

When I stopped drinking I didn’t really considered I had a drinking issue.

On the other hand I also knew that people without a drinking issue would be looking at sober communities online.

[–] WarlockLawyer 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

If you can be healthy in moderation be healthy in moderation. Building up alcohol as some superhuman evil power that you will instantly fall to if you have a sip isn't healthy either

[–] AteshgaRubyTeeth 2 points 11 months ago

In the past I was very absolute in many ways and I’ve changed this in other aspects in my life.

I’m wondering if I can do the same with alcohol.

It just feels like I have something special by not drinking for this many years.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I feel you, you're not alone. I guess it's the festive season. I quit 6 years or so ago but still miss it sometimes. The scary thing is that I took a sip of a new alcohol drink of my spouse and immediately felt all the urges and triggers to drink more and more. Just a sip and it was back much stronger than it was ever before. Super scary stuff.

Iwndwyt.

[–] AteshgaRubyTeeth 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I’m wondering if I’m still the guy who only saw the percentage of alcohol on the beer menu.

On the other hand might be a bit dangerous to try and see if I still am.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago (2 children)

It is dangerous. One thing I remember from sd on Reddit is the various posts of people that moderation didn't work. Never seen a post of someone where it had worked out.

[–] WarlockLawyer 3 points 11 months ago

Likely because any support group is for the group needing support. If someone is successful in moderation they are unlikely to return to the support group, while those who relapse will return to discuss it.

[–] AteshgaRubyTeeth 1 points 11 months ago

Yeah but I constantly have this little goblin in the back of my head saying this time it’ll be different.

[–] Zerlyna 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I have nowhere near the days that you have but empathize with all your thoughts. I miss that buzzed feeling but know it never stops there.

[–] AteshgaRubyTeeth 4 points 11 months ago

Just take it one day at a time and you’ll get there

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

So disclaimer, I don't drink and never have, so I don't have the same perspective. My mother does, though.

None of the others in my family drink and none of her friends drink like 20 yos. Still, she relatively regularly drinks way too much, even without anybody else with her. Other people not drinking as much does not stop her at all.

At least in her case, other people not drinking as much does not stop her at all, even if she intends to "only drink a little".

Also remember that your tolerance will be way way lower now. Whatever you do, be safe! (And I strongly recommend that you don't, fwiw).

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Why bother with it though? It does not enhance life, it only brings destruction.

[–] AteshgaRubyTeeth 1 points 10 months ago

For me drugs, in moderation, do enhance life. A beautiful mushroom trip opening my mind to be able to see new patterns. Losing my sense of self in a ketamine trip was also a profound experience in realizing a lot of how we think is a construct and not inherently “real”.

The world, for me, is not so black and white.

That’s why I was playing with the thought of having a drink again. Now that the holidays are over the urge has lessened and I can continue my life of not drinking.

[–] gibmiser 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Sounds like you are bored

[–] AteshgaRubyTeeth 1 points 11 months ago

Don’t think so, it’s just that I see people around me drinking a few and calling it a night these festive holidays.