this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2023
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Daddit - Parenting for Dads

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Just needed to vocalize to get it out to avoid passing the feelings on to the fam.

Starting a road trip with two young ones. Kind of stressed about it - we're doing 30+hrs total car-time over the next couple of weeks.

Have lots of contingencies for the car ride, planned lots of stops, have lots of snacks and some new distractions for the kids.

Trying to tell myself over and over it's not about getting there, it's about making a day out of the drives. It's a very different approach to how I've always traveled - usually my wife and I would just power thru and get there. With a potty trainer and a new walker I'm still coming to terms with expecting to stop every 30m. Idk that my heads totally there yet and wanted to share, even if just to put my thoughts on "paper".

How have other dad's out there had success with young ones on long trips? Any tips or ideas are welcome :)

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[–] galacticnavigator 4 points 1 year ago

We've done quite a few longer drives around 10-14 hrs with a now 2 and a 4. Keep on the lookout for playgrounds to stretch legs. The 1yo almost always sleeps and the 4yo loves the opportunity to watch a few movies on a phone with headphones. Do what ever you need to to get there safely even if it isn't necessarily the best parenting.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I'm a bit late to this, but a couple of things we did when the kiddos were younger:

  1. Favorite blanket, pillow, and stuffy
  2. A sunshade for their seat
  3. Ask at EVERY rest stop, "Who needs to pee?" and then stop at every single one if needed...(and then everyone gets out to stretch even if they don't need to pee)
  4. Love the ideas mentioned above about small toys wrapped up. We did variations on this.
  5. They each get to pack their own shoebox (e.g., 6 qt Sterilite Storage Container ) with anything they want.
  6. Play the license plate game.
  7. Headphones for any electronics that are coming AND the car charger or inverter for said electronic
  8. Hotspot or one of our phones in hotspot mode
[–] Otkaz 3 points 1 year ago

Load up a tablet with movies. Just took my kids on a 16 hour drive a few weeks ago. Kept the movies playing and I don't think they ever noticed they were in a car.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The longest trip I've gone on with my son has only been about 5 hours and it was after he was past the potty-training stage, so I can't really comment on something like a 30+ hour trip with toddlers. That said, I found it really helpful to play podcasts and music that are interesting to kids during the drive. We loaded up my phone with stuff like "Wow in the World", "The Adventures of Finn Caspian", "Caspar Babypants" (Chris Ballew from PotUSA), and They Might Be Giants. Basically stuff that isn't super irritating for the adults, but will keep the kids entertained. We did have to take regular rest-stop breaks, but it worked pretty well and wasn't nearly as disruptive as I anticipated. Also keep in mind that with younger kids especially, they will probably end up sleeping for long stretches of the trip anyway. Sitting in a car for long stretches is more tiring than it seems. Plan to take regular breaks just to stretch everyone's legs, even if they don't have to go potty.

[–] rhacer 3 points 1 year ago

My daughter is a spectacular traveler, so I'm very blessed. When she was 15 months we took her on an 1800 mile trip over a long 4-day weekend. I think she cried for a grand total of two hours that entire trip.

Just make sure to stop frequently to give them a break. In the age of electronics it's possible to give them videos to watch, but I kinda hate this because you miss so much of the world in which we live.

Another option is pod casts for small people. My daughter loved Bedtime stories for rebel girls.

Play the license plate games. Start at zero and the goal is to count upwards. So spot a plate with a 0 then a plate with a 1, and so on

You can do three same with letters of the alphabet.

Collect license plates from as many states as possible.

These all keep the focus outward instead of on screens.

Hope some of those help.

[–] like47ninjas 3 points 1 year ago

I think I put 90 "bookmarks" on Google maps for playgrounds or other activities. Playgrounds near highways are wonderful. Hard part we found was finding decent places on the longer stretches on major highways.

We did the first leg & the big wins for us, were stopping proactively for everyone to stretch their legs and finding a public library in a smaller town when traffic was bad. It was a really good spot to stop when it's hot :P. Great activities for the kids, clean bathrooms, and AC.

Appreciate the thoughts from folks. The journey continues!! :)

[–] orangeNgreen 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I haven’t tried this yet, but here is a tip I was given for toddler-aged kids. Buy a bunch of toys from the dollar store. Gift wrap them. Place them in a large bag. Every hour or so, let your kid(s) pick another toy from the bag. Just one. The process of getting to pick a gift wrapped toy, open it, and then play with the new toy for awhile should keep the entertained. Not sure if you can kill 30 hours with that, but should help for a good while.

Edit: I feel I should add that the toys should not be choking hazards. And for your own sanity, shouldn’t make a mess.

[–] like47ninjas 3 points 1 year ago

My wife got a couple of new toys for the kids off Amazon for this reason and they have done exactly what you mentioned. Got us an hour here or there on the longer stretches for the first leg.

At one point a McDonalds happy meal toy did the same thing so in a pinch that was kind of nice.

Tablet works wonders for my older one unless we're on any sort of windy road. The little one just wants to be out walking around so that's where most of our energy goes.

Has been fun so far, we're 1/3 of the way there & called an audible to split 2 of the 7-8hr (by Google so longer in reality) driving days in half. It means a couple of extra nights in hotels but it should be easier on everyone.

[–] essteeyou 2 points 1 year ago

My son usually slept for hours of our road trips around the ages you're talking about. On one particularly bad trip he stayed awake a lot. We played what he now calls "the animal game" where one person thinks of an animal and the others in the car ask yes/no questions to try to figure out what the animal is.

A spin-off is "the character game" featuring TV show, movie, video game, or book characters. Those two games have passed hours on our drives, and it feels more engaging than screen time or loads of gifts, but no judgement for those who use the other methods. We all just have to get through these things! :-)

[–] ClanOfTheOcho 2 points 1 year ago

That sounds like a lot of stopping. I don't think you'll need to do that often, unless you really want to. We have always used hour long drives as means of calming our kids down when all other means have failed, so I think your kids will be ok. 30+ hours is a lot, but if it's spread out over 2 weeks, I don't think you'll be miserable.

My kids will happily play on tablets, but that may not be an option, especially for your younger kid. I try to let them help choose a playlist, or maybe some kids books in audio format.

Anyway, I understand the stressing, as I've been there myself, but it most likely will be fine.

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