this post was submitted on 13 Oct 2023
1195 points (97.1% liked)

Memes

46442 readers
3520 users here now

Rules:

  1. Be civil and nice.
  2. Try not to excessively repost, as a rule of thumb, wait at least 2 months to do it if you have to.

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 28 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 48 points 1 year ago

Unironically philosophical

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 year ago

Farts are universally funny. Like sex jokes, they transcend time and language.

In fact, the oldest joke we have discovered was a fart joke:

Something which has never occurred since time immemorial... A young woman did not fart in her husband's lap.

Compare that to a different joke from about 200 years later:

A dog entered into a tavern and said, 'I cannot see anything. I shall open this one

It doesn't matter where or when you're from, nor does it matter what language you speak, farts are funny and will continue to be funny forever.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (2 children)

If I find your farts funny then I'm scaling the current level of joy per fart. We can have an import / export scheme. My gross domestic product is outrageous.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Fart Vandalay.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Are you suggesting something like the tin cans with a string in the middle, but replacing the string with a hose. We're gonna need some government subsidies on our farts because eventually one of us is going to overproduce and kill the other in a horrific explosion.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

... Fart-splosion? What a way to go.

[–] foofiepie 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I always blame mine on the cat.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I blame mine on the hamsters.

I had to gradually buy about 95 to make it seem plausible but I got there in the end.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The great thing that 95 hamsters and farting so much that you need 95 hamsters have in common is that visitors already know exactly what they're in for based on the smell.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I actually only needed the volumetric farts of about 15 hamsters.

However, I thought it's not realistic to have them all fart at the same time, so I kept buying more.

Eventually it was a big enough group that it seemed more statistically plausible that 15 of them farted in unison.

I feed them beer and cheese and beans to increase the hypothetical flatulence interval of each hamster.

Also I have found, adding "I don't know, maybe something startled them and some of them... Went off" helps. I could buy a few more hamsters instead, but times are hard.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

God I love this comment section

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Shit Emily, that's deep.

[–] Donkter 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Same logic applies to murder.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Who said murder wasn't funny?

[–] chimasterflex 7 points 1 year ago

Idk! You can't even spell slaughter without laughter

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I think that people that don't find farts funny are fakers or have brain damage. It's pretty much a reflex to trigger the funny center of the brain.

[–] MotoAsh 15 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I think it depends greatly on what part of the fart they're enjoying and why. Someone laughing at a nicely audible, clean rip is very different than someone chuckling at overhearing a wet one.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago

You sound like a bit of a connoisseur. Did you perhaps minor in flatuent psychology?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Both are funny to me. I didn't know there's comedic range to poop-air.

[–] gibmiser 7 points 1 year ago

I think for wet facts the comedy is inversely proportional to the distance from you.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm the rather fart in a toilet than shit in your pants sort. It's mostly me finding it pretty fucked to make people smell your shit fumes.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

To be fair, if you say "Smell my shit fumes!" before letting one rip, it naturally changes the tone of the whole proceeding.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And I know a coworker that would 100% say that in an enclosed space.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Is that me?

[–] Jessvj93 0 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Narcissism, so mental health in the "I'm better than this" basket lol

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

The most concise and convincing argument about any topic ever.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Emjoying farts is just micro dosing your scat fetish

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I read this while farting.