Curly Hair

I think the Shea Moisture is maybe not right for your hair. It may be building up and causing issues.Are you in the US? Sally Beauty GVP conditioning balm is like an allergy diet for hair. Conditioner without oil or silicone or much protein just smoothing.

My kid with bleached hair loves AG Sleeek as a leave in, it does have some silicone. She also does sometimes Olaplex.

The one with fine but nonporous hair loves the Innersense Hydrating Hairbath. You might be good with that shampoo, a little conditioner left in, and something for hold, I would say a light gel rather than mousse as even I find mousse drying. Kinky Curly Custard or (again Sally Beauty) Biotera "alcohol free gel with bamboo" quite a mouthful of a name but it's cheap as heck and very good. Or Garnier Fructis gel cream, that one is light hold and moisturizing.

Editing to add, since you rinse it every morning, have you considered doing a water only routine? What happens if you just don't wash it at the end of the week? I've known 2 people in real life who do that, both had very fine hair around 3a in curl type.

Shoot, forgot to say, I shampoo and condition once a week and rinse it every morning

We have very, very similar hair, and I've always struggled with this problem. I'm gonna tell you what I'm working on. Maybe it will work for you. Shea Moisture was always way too heavy for me. Yes, you might need moisture, but it's not great for fine hair. I use a gentle clarifying shampoo that does include sulfates, and right now, I'm shampooing twice a week, three times if something gets funky and I need a refresh. I know that Curly Girl acolytes go sulfate free, but my fine, thin hair needs the cleanser. Before I shampoo, almost every time unless I'm coming back from a run or just don't have time, I coat my hair in quality extra virgin olive oil. I leave it on for about an hour. Sometimes I'll coat my hair and then go for a walk or a run, even. I shampoo, then I use a deep conditioner that I leave on for several minutes in the shower. I rinse with lukewarm water, towel dry, then follow with a leave-in conditioner on the ends only, finger coil and gently scrunch, then air dry, unless I need to go out, then I gently diffuse. Sometimes I will root clip if I feel like it. I do this about two times a week, like I said.

If my hair is getting limp in between washes, I will rinse with only water in the shower and follow with the leave-in conditioner again on the ends. I tend to root clip after a water-only wash to help the roots from lying flat.

Now, I'm starting a new routine with my Sunday wash. I'm doing an egg mask. I followed this woman's video (besides the extra products she uses like The Ordinary hair serum) the first time, and I ended up with really hydrated, defined curls: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1LhfHaxi4p0

I'm going to try doing this once a week through the fall and winter and see what kind of results I get.

Because my hair is so fine and prone to breakage and being weighed down, I'm hoping that the oil and egg will add some much-needed moisture, protein, and general nutrition.

Also I just watched this guy's video and maybe I'm a little persuaded now. Anyway, good luck! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXiZAQwZQjc

Do you use leave-in conditioner or cream? That can really help with keeping your hair moisturized. I think not having enough moisture is why your hair feels dry/frizzy/hay-like. You can try adding in a deep conditioner, Shea Moisture has a manuka honey deep hydration masque you could try. If that doesn't help, there might be too much protein in your products (your hair might feel stiff, tangly, sticky, and brittle if this is the case). Too much protein is fixed by clarifying to get rid of the protein buildup and then using different products with less protein or a different protein in them or no protein if your hair doesn't need it. Fine and high porosity hair generally can benefit from some protein, you don't need it in every product when you're first starting.

How is your hair's elasticity? You can test this by when you stretch it, does it bounce back (normal), doesn't stretch / snaps (need more moisture), does not bounce back when stretched (need more protein). Also how long is your hair? If it is long, your hair might be weighed down by the weight so that's why it doesn't curl the first few inches, this can happen with fine hair. Stringiness while wet sounds normal.

Use a leave-in conditioner. This helps to provide extra hydration and moisture benefits to your strands making it easier to brush or comb through without causing breakage. I use this one garnier

Extra tips. When I use my products. My hair is soaking wet before applying it, I feel this creates less frizz rather than damp

Use a satin bonnet or a satin pillowcase to sleep both will help you to maintain your hair healthy, hydrated, and moist and preserve your waves for the next day. I like and use this brand. Great satin quality satin bonnet and satin pillowcase

I like to use gel because this helps to hold the curls so that they don’t fall flat through the day The gel helps retain moisture better and less frizzy hair. I like this one kinky curly

I hope this helps.