this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2023
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Your can make up one if you wish too but keep things pg-pg-13 becasue why not, idk. pretend this is an interveiw and try to get hired to join some big superhero company or something.

this might be intersting or funny.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Being able to teleport only 1 foot away

Seems useless until you realize that it can absolutely come in clutch if you're ever physically stuck anywhere

[–] tubbadu 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

And you can pass through walls

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

teleports into wall and dies

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Being able to breathe underwater, no boosts to handling pressures and no talking to fish. You can’t go rescue dumb submarines, you still swim slower than any trained seal or dolphin, and cleaning the office fish tank doesn’t require swimming.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

But think of the epic bathing you can accomplish. I'm talking FULL. BODY. SUBMERSION.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

Finally, you could be 100% clean.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Clumsy Vision. You shoot rays out of your eyes that make the person mildly clumsy for a few minutes. Not like Slapstick Comedy levels of clumsiness, but just like tripping over their shoelaces or looking back and running into a pole clumsy.

You've won a few battles (like that time the purse thief mistook you for an A lister superhero, ran away, tripped over their own feet, and twisted their ankle), but you're mostly useful for anything other than occasionally stopping petty criminal behavior.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Infinite and unlimited flatulence and defecation. Unlimited fertilizer and methane. Solves the tops soil issue and the energy crisis.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

JoJo's Bizarre Adventures proposes a couple of interesting . One villain has a power called "The Lovers" he manifests a tiny ,almost microscopic, insect creature which is physically very very weak (or at least the weakest we have seen at that point), but has the ability of going crazy whenever the stand user feels any kind of pain, so he sends the stand inside an opponents ear to their brain and pain centre – whenever he feels any pain The Lovers inflicts that same pain but much worse on his opponent. It's also heavily implied that any pain caused by The Lovers that is above a certain level would be lethal.

Super weak power that is actually really strong if used intelligently.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

Super hearing. I probably wouldn't tell them that it gave me super tinnitus

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

The ability to boil eggs by looking at them. Always the same consistency which is slightly too hard for your own tastes.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (2 children)

There's a Marvel character who's "super" power is that he is instantly forgotten by everyone the moment they don't see him anymore. Seems like a pretty shitty predicament but it can be very useful.

[–] TurnItOff_OnAgain 1 points 2 years ago

Sounds like The Silence in Dr. Who

[–] 3rdBlueWizard 1 points 2 years ago

Seems extremely powerful to me. You can do anything that doesn't get you killed immediately. It makes normal life impossible though. Actually, seems like a lot of interesting premises could come from that.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

First thing that comes to mind is RocketJump's video Milk Man: World's Worst Superhero. Essentially, his power is drinking and regurgitating milk. While this sounds lame, he actually manages to disarm and incapacitate the robber, fly, and give the distressed citizen a nice, refreshing beverage. Sounds pretty useful to me.

Now, only one question remains: Got Milk?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

In the British TV show Misfits there was a villain who had the power of limited telekinetic control of milk (and cheese), he literally managed to successfully kill all but one of the main heroes (including the guy whose power was the ability to resurrect himself!). He was only stopped because of time travel by the one hero who was also lactose intolerant.

[–] goldgate 1 points 2 years ago

Being Bullshit man. It gives you power of superhearing, flight, super speed, and ability to call-out bullshit.

[–] RomanRoy 1 points 2 years ago

Teleporting is absolutely OP, so as mind control. IMO, both should be banned for the sake of discussion.

With that said, spider sense would be cool as fuck.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Hindsight. Always useful. Terrible timing.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

I guess you can always perfectly learn from your past mistakes. Though it means you use the power less and less as you learn/get better