Eeek... this picture makes me uncomfortable.
this post was submitted on 17 Jun 2023
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Autism
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When I feel like making eye contact turns out you're not supposed to directly look at people's iris. I even shared "tips" to some friends about just switching to look at each eye to make it more "friendly". Lmao.
That's brilliant. I'm on the spectrum and have always had issues with eye contact and feeling like I'm just STARING at someone. I usually will look in to someone's eyes for like 2 seconds before the "pressure"(?) starts to build and I have to look somewhere else like their chin or forehead. I'll try looking at each eye individually next time!
Another technique you can try is the "triangle method." This involves shifting your gaze every few seconds from one eye, to the other, and then to the mouth or nose, creating an invisible triangle. This mimics natural eye movement and can help reduce the intensity of direct eye contact.
I'll try this but maybe with the forehead instead of looking down. Idk why but I really hate looking at people's mouths when they talk. Haha. I get distracted with, "ew, what is that gross thing you're doing with the hole in your face?"
Yeah, eye contact has always been tough for me. After about 2~3 seconds, my brain feels like it's being severely tickled. One trick I've picked-up is look at the middle of their forehead or the bridge of their nose. I've asked a number of people after trying, and they said they couldn't tell the difference.
What helped me a lot was to look at a single eye, and not be afraid not to respond immediately (just a quick « let me think about it » + break eye contact + take 5-10 seconds before speaking again). Not perfect, but it’s much more manageable this way. If it’s a meeting with multiple people, I also tend to not look at the other people immediately (it feels easier to me to look at others while I am already « reciting »).
I just usually look in someone's general direction and they handle the eye contact. They're doing most of the work not me. It's great I don't even have to think about it
If that's how it feels, then probably not, no.
I hate eye contact but I can do it. The problem is, I have to concentrate on doing it so much that it distracts me from whatever conversation I am supposed to be having. I finally just got a bunch of pairs of really cool sunglasses and started wearing them 24/7, indoors and out, night and day. It took a while to train my eyes and collect enough sunglasses that have different levels of tint to work at night/in dim rooms, but I love my sunglasses collection and being the mysterious sunglasses guy all the time. Sometimes it offends people for whatever reason, and if it does, I straight up tell them I'm autistic and it's a sensory issue. That usually shuts them right up. I say it in a way that makes them feel like an asshole for mentioning it. "Well since it bothers YOU so much/since YOU have an issue with it, maybe I should explain..."
Tldr: hate eye contact, love sunglasses.