Homestuck

The time of reckoning is near!

As far as we know this means all the asteroids in the veil get warped around many of them into Skiai. carcinoGeneticist [CG] mentioned that this was the game's way of making the player hurry up and kill the black king. But this isn't quite fair, or normal. Johns only passed the second ring and Jade isn't even in the game yet (at least not in the waking world). What extra unfairness as the game seems to be the entire reason John exists. The game somehow made him create himself in a lab just to play it, and it’s doomed him.

CG contacts John once more. John's surrounded by babies and wonders how the reckoning is going to get them to their timelines. CG reminds John he can't really stop the reckoning. Also it’s about to start in a few minutes. It’s not an instant process but it's way too early to prevent. CG has mentioned that his own session was different. That he knows that the event is occurring too early, but he’s never said way. John asked CG what is different here. CG only responds with “JACK NOIR”.

John had no idea who Jack was at this point. In the troll session Jack had been an ally. He helped the trolls defeat the queen then became their exiled guide. He’s not supposed to have committed regicide and become a usurper. By taking control he is advancing the game's plot way ahead of schedule. John is not really processing any of this.

CG mentions he might as well give the babies to bunnies now. John thinks about this a minute and we get what many consider to be the most stupid moment in all of Homestuck. As once again John relives that scene from Con Air.

(I had to watch is many times, you owe me).

This animation's done with Micheal Guy Bowman serenading us with a version of How do I Live. The song featured in this scene of Con Air. John emotionally returns to the oil covered bunny to Baby Rose. Rose doesn't really want it but seems to take it anyway. This while practically punching the baby version of her mother out of the way. As he does this CG is watching in cringe and confusion. As John was taking in the raw emotion of this moment, baby Jade tugged on his pants. John remembers he had taken the modified bunny that Rose had made for him. So he once again repeats the scene but for baby Jade. He gives her the half knitted bunny as the music hits its crescendo. At this point as CG is dying of cringe gallowsCalibrator [GC] comes from behind him pointing at the screen and laughing. I’ll point out that this doesn't even make sense! She can't see the damn screen!

Anyway I can kind of see why this might be somewhat of a real emotional moment for him. Again he hasn't actually met most of his friends in person. He recently ran into Rose but she was asleep. This is the only moment so far where he is with all of his friends in person. Even if they are all babies. John takes his friendships very sincerely and isn't afraid to show them vulnerability. We’ve seen this in the notes he had left to each of them. Today is really another birthday for all of them and he again gets to give them gifts (except Dave I guess?). He could have also at least pinned a note to himself or something but there is still time i guess. Another way we can see this is that John is processing some serious Trauma. For John movies are his source of comfort. Engaging in flatout escapism seems like his reaction to all the crap he is dealing with. Last time he was dealing with stuff he learned he had vandalized his own room and had no idea why. He also learned his father wasn't really a professional busking prankster. He learned his was a mundane businessman. Though we now know his fathers interest in japery is actually from John's grandma. Johns now just learned he was born in a lab. His father isn't actually his father at all, John may have just realized he's adopted. He saw his grandmother's death, by a meteor. He might also have noted that the meteor was actually his baby self crashing to the planet. So in some sense he may now blame himself for his grandma’s death. There’s also an existential horror here. He is his own creator, and the creator of his friends. What responsibility must he feel from this? Especially knowing that they are all doomed. That part probably is what broke him at this time with CG pushing that knowledge onto him.

And this ends Act 4…? Well no. I guess Andrew decided to follow up the dumb moment with a psyche out. That's fine because I have a 10 page minimum.

Speaking of Trauma Dave is looking at his blood soaked hands. He’s just unceremoniously tossed a body out of his window into a lake of lava. It was his own body. He’s learning that time travel can be dangerous. He hid the body quickly because he knew if Jade saw it, that it might freak her out.

gallowsCalibrator [GC] pesters Dave. She asks Dave what his blood smells like, what it tastes like. Apparently this is the first time she’s pestered Dave. GCs trolling is weird and only effective in how persistent she is about it. She draws a lot of pictures, but given she is blind they dont really make sense. Dave explains what his blood looks like, he poetically calls it a vermillion symphony to his eyes. Though it's hard to say if he really feels that or if he’s just trying to be cool. He’s trying to use the fact that he can see to counter troll, which is a bit mean but GC is rolling with it. adiosToreador [AT] is pestering Jade. Though Jade is still asleep in the waking wor;d her dream bot is allowing her to respond. She mentions to AT that she would wake up but she needs to figure out how to get John to awaken first. She doesn't know how yet. AT has so far absolutely failed at trolling. Even with the timeline advantages Dave and Rose have both counter trolled him into dust. It seems he’s just giving up now and trying to help Jade. He mentions this to Jade and tries to help out. Firstly, At mentions he can't really tell if she succeeds or not but he knows that she will wake up soon. He also lets her know that her robot will blow up in the future; he is able to confirm this with her future self. She also says that the other trolls are not as bad as they seem. AT seems skeptical on that one. Jade points out the other trolls refuse to talk to while she is dreaming. AT mentions that is odd as he preferred the dreaming world, at least until his dream self died.

Rose is using her newest gear to do some house cleaning. In that she is effortlessly making Orges explode with her cool spell wands. grimAuxiliatrix [GA] pesters her at this time. GA’s first encounter with Rose was actually with John using Rose's account. This has led to GA having a really bad opinion of Rose ever since. GA is wondering if she’s reached the “Smart Rose” or the “Dumb Rose”. Rose explains there is actually an explanation to that. But she’s actually a little too busy at the moment to chat about it. Also she’s worried it will affect the timeline. GA takes this as scorn and leaves the conversation.

Back to GC and Dave. GC attempts another photo edit of Dave and his bro being Marty and the Doc from Back to the Future. Dave mentions he hasn't actually seen his Bro in awhile. Neither have we the audience. He wasn't on the ship with Rose's mom and John dad. She confirms that between now and The Rift (the event where the trolls cannot see past) he doesn't see his brother again. She ribs him for missing his brother and suggests that she will guide him instead. She mentions he will meet friendly crocodiles past the first gate and he 's terrified of them.